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2 day is 2 angel dates


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25 years ago today my daddy was shot and killed by his father over dirty dishes in the sink. I had gone to see him that morning. Everyone including my mom had got to say goodbye to him a few days before this happened.  I will never forget that day. It's so hard to actually grasp that kind of loss. Its a very long story but the just of it is he was shot and killed because of dirty dishes in the sink from the breakfasthed cooked that morning. He had asked me baby can I make you some breakfast and my last words to him was no thank you daddy some other time. Well there was no other time. It took me 21 years to be able to get through this day without losing my ****. I mean how can or do you handle something like that. So come Aug I quit paying attention to the dates. Maybe I can get past the day without.... I don't know. Just get through the day.  Then on year 23 my ESA (emotional support animal)  Snoop got sick. I had to take her to the vet and her kidneys had failed. I knew it was time to lay her to rest. Like I said come Aug I quit paying attention to the dates.  They hand her back to me after they put the iv in and I said alright give her the meds. Well right before he stuck the needle in the iv port I looked at my watch. It was Sept 14th. I said great a dbl whammy on this day now. As they gave her the shot I saw her eyes cloud over. I waited...  I don't know how long it was but I remember crying out in anguish oh God no not my baby. I hope it was long enough that she had already crossed the rainbow bridge. I would hate for her to have heard my dispare as she passed. So now today I break down 😭 not just for my father who was taken away from me by his father 25 years ago but because I lost my 17 year old baby best friend partner love 💔  2 years ago. So much loss and grief in one person's life. The rest of the year I am an emotional wreck. Today starts a crucial time. From the loss of my father and baby my late husband and my anniversary Nov 12. His death Nov 17. Then Thanksgiving.  On to Dec 7 my mothers bday to Dec 16 her passing and then Christmas. I am going to prewarn all who read my post that this is a horrible time of year for me.  I do my best to stay positive and like I said earlier I do my best to lose track of days and times so maybe yall won't have to hear my cries of utter anguish and dispare. I will appreciate any help I can get throughout this time. 

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