Mrs

[Miserablebymarriage]

Marriage is dying.

My husband and I, will have been married for 4 years this October. Been together 7 years now in total. 
I just don’t think I can do this anymore, he is just cruel to me, everyday. To give a picture, my husband works in hospitality, he is barely ever home & when he is here, he never truly is. 
I don’t hear from him all day whilst he is working, which I can understand because hospitality is a busy industry. When he comes home all he does as soon as he has walked through the door & before saying hello, is open a beer and complain about how tired he is. But when he gets the chance to finish early he goes to the pub with his work colleagues and then stays out late. He sometimes even stops over on the country lanes to have a kip meaning he comes home 2-3am. We have find friends and so I can see where he is. He does nothing with me, I work from home. We only have 1 car which is always with him. I don’t go anywhere and if we get the day off together we are normally in a fight. I live in a very rural area and I feel very very lonely. I have 2 dogs as my only company and I just sit at home after finishing work and cry. Waiting for him to come home even though I know when he is here I will still feel sad and lonely. He makes no effort, all he cares about is having a drink, drumming and doing what pleases him. He doesn’t help around the house or do anything nice for me. I’m just a maid and another payslip to pay for the house and bills. 
He never wants to talk about it and doesn’t seem to care that he upsets me so much by coming late everyday, stomping on the side of the road. He ignores my calls but then says I love you, I love you, I can’t lose you. I try again and I always find myself back at square one. I don’t know where to go or how to start a move away. I just feel so sad.

[reader]

I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. Please know you're not alone. I know you mentioned you live in a rural area, but I hope you'll consider accessing these resources and getting more help for yourself. Thinking of you. x 

https://www.betterhelp.com/

https://www.talkspace.com/blog/marriage-counseling-guide-couples-therapy/

https://www.aarp.org/home-family/friends-family/info-2020/marriage-counseling.html

https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/couples-thrive/201905/5-ways-marriage-counseling-can-save-troubled-marriage

[Miserablebymarriage]

Thank you for the support and reading links Reader. I suggested counselling and I just got silenced and told nothing was wrong. I’m getting stronger everyday and I believe one day I will find the power to walk away and be better on my own. Thank you for the thoughts x