My cat died in a horrific accident

[Britne]

Yesterday I was at work, at my boyfriend called me crying and I just knew something was horribly wrong. He said that my 4 month old kitten got into our dryer and he had no idea she was in there, and he started the dryer. He heard thumping and didn’t think anything of it, but then he decided to check and our baby girl was in there. Fighting for her life, she was bleeding out of her mouth, he lost her fur on her leg, her eyes rolled in the back of her head. He tried to do everything he could to save her, he tried CPR, he rushed her to the emergency vet and it was too late. So many things have been going through our mind like “what if”. These what if statements are eating us alive. I’m so worried that my baby girl is in heaven mad at us and blaming us. This is the hardest thing we’ve ever gone through. I attached a photo of our beautiful girl. We were very attached to her because we rescued her from a construction site when she was only 3-4 days old. She did everything with us. It kills me knowing we have to go on without her. Her siblings are still available to go to a new home, and we are wanting to take one of her siblings so we still have a little “piece of her”. Is it too soon? 

[foreverhis]

Welcome.  I am so sorry, sorrier than I can say, that you have lost your precious kitten.  It's not surprising at all that you are both going through the "What if...?" and "Why...?" questions and things like that.  It's so common as to be universal for those of us who find their way here.  I had those questions and carried guilt when my sweet husband died.  When our two most special pets (one cat, age 18, and one dog, age 14-1/2) died a few years apart, my husband and I both had those questions.  What could or should we have done differently to keep them with us longer?  It's my belief that part of the reason we feel guilt is that our hearts are desperately searching for a different story.  And because we are the ones here, we naturally (if usually figuratively) look in the mirror, point at ourselves, and say, "You're to blame."  I urge you and your boyfriend to help each other through your grief, knowing that it was a tragic accident that happens more often than people realize.  He will likely need reassurances from you for some time that you don't "hate" him for what happened.  I pray you are able to give him that comfort.

I have 100% faith that our loved pets go to the Rainbow Bridge.  It probably isn't how any of us picture it, but it exists.  I'm certain of it.  I also believe that our pets forgive us for our faults and imperfection instantly because they know how much we love them.  I said one time in another thread that I sometimes think our furry loves are sent to show us a glimpse of heaven (in whatever form we believe).  Their pure love, forgiving hearts, and unfailing loyalty are examples we should try to follow.

Only you can decide if bringing home one of her siblings would help you heal or make your grief worse.  One thing that I can almost guarantee it would not do is make it go away.  There is simply no way to do that.  Still, it might help your shattered hearts start to mend and soften your pain.  If you can, take a little time, talk it over, consider the long term, and then decide.

I'm glad you found your way here.  Every member understands the grief you are feeling.  You are not alone.

[Britne]

Thank you so much for your kind words and for taking the time to post this comment. It has both my boyfriend and I in tears. I do not blame him in any way shape or form, and he knows that. He has been more comforting to me than ever. Luckily, he doesn’t blame himself for what happened. He’s taking this a lot better than I am. He is thankful that she died in his arms. I’m quite envious, but I don’t know if I would have been okay if she died in my arms. I just couldn’t say. Thank you again for everything you just said. We appreciate it more than you’ll ever know. 

[KayC]

I am so sorry for both of your loss.  This is very common as you can see.
Cats killed in dryers
Cats Still Getting Killed in Dryers

I truly believe we'll be with them again, I hope this thought brings you some comfort and peace.
Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers

 

[AJWCat]

Heartbreaking, I am so so sorry for you guys.