I miss my grandad

[FeelingLost888]

Man where to start. It's been just over 3 months since grandad passed away. We were always close and I miss him so much.. him and nan (who we lost to cancer 12 yrs ago) practically raised me. Today we finished cleaning out the house and getting ready for new owners I lives so much of my life in that house and it kills me to see it go.but most of all im struggling with the fact I'll never be able to have another conversation with him about the old days the air force the state of the world just anything really I really didn't think losing his would be this tough he was 95 but it still hurts. I owe so much of who i am to both grandparents but mostly grandad i dont know if ill ever feel normal again :( 

[Ash14]

We're feeling the same way. My grandma passed away almost 1 month now. She was 97 yo. Just like you I am very close tomy grandma, i grew up with her til I was 5, then i pretty much go everyday in her place. Every daily activity that I do reminds me of her. From opening the windows in my room (she used to do that before) to eating (she always remind me to eat). It pains me everyday and I literally need to distract myself just so I dont think about it. I need to watch something or do something constantly just to escape from the pain. I also sleep a lot to the point that my sleep schedule is really ruined. I know that I have to face this grief now before it turns into "something else". 

I know that it is better for her to be gone so that she wont suffer anymore but I cant help but miss her everyday. I can no longer process my emotions and everytime I talk about it to someone they say that I need to get over it or what im doing is not correct. It is so difficult that I have no one to talk to. They are saying that I should not be crying because the soul of my grandma will feel sad and will find it more difficult to go to heaven and stuff like that. I need to cry because it is how I release my emotion and now Im even feeling guilty about it.