Dealing with my father's things is so rich yet painful!

[Zdislava]

Dear reader - As you know, this whole thing is so complex and long-lived but the piece that's up for me now is dealing with my father's belongings. (He died in February) I am grateful that it's "fallen" to me because then I can do it pretty much as I please. It's a mixed bag - I'm definately getting to know him better as I do this but it's also painful and exausting. Some of it has to be discarded because (He had the downstairs bedroom in a New Hampshire house and the caregiver woops didn't run the humidifier) it's molded but even some of those things are emotionally charged for me - his hats for example! The only reason there's ANY pressure on me to deal with this at a time when his death is relatively fresh is that it's costing me $400/mo just in taxes and insurance to hold onto that place but I do not feel ready to surrender it. (My father gave his property to a forest conservation group, so I can't sell the house and recoup any expenditures in that way.)

There's so much more to say yet - past a point - nothing more to say. It's just painful sorting through and in some cases disposing of his belongings. I know you understand. Thank you. 

[Zee24]

You are so brave for dealing with this. Every step of this way is so difficult and painful really. Sending you love and strength.