Agnes, my Chihuahua

[Randyjohnson]

On July 11, 2020 my Applehead Chihuahua dog passed away. Her name was Agnes. She was nine years old. I found her dead about 10:00 PM. I was about to go to bed but immediately knew there was no need to go to bed. When I found her dead in the kitchen, I knew that I wouldn't be able to get any sleep so I stayed up most of the night.

I adopted Agnes on August 27, 2013. My ex-friend and I were out looking for me a Chihuahua dog. As she put gas in her Durango, I made a decision. I decided that if the dog I found was a female, I would name it after my late mother. My ex-friend and I went to a woman's house who runs her own rescue service. She only had one Chihuahua and it was a female.

I eventually bought two more Chihuahua dogs. Both dogs are hyper so I keep them in my basement. It wasn't until I  bought those dogs that I truly appreciated what a great dog Agnes was. Agnes was one of the sweetest dogs around and wasn't one bit hyper. After getting my two new dogs, I learned how special Agnes was. Agnes was a bit on the hateful side when I adopted her but she soon grew out of it. When I took Agnes to a vet in 2017, I learned that she had a heart murmur.

Because of a mental disorder, I hear voices from time to time. As an ice cream truck drove through the subdivision where I live, I heard a voice. The voice told me to buy an ice cream and eat it while standing over Agnes's grave. I did so but it tore me up pretty bad. Yes, I hear voices sometimes but don't worry. The voices don't tell me to hurt people. I have a mental disorder but I'm not a psycho.

When I adopted Agnes, I got the Holy Grail of dogs. As far as I'm concerned, she was the best dog on the planet. She loved me and the feeling was mutual. Some friends invited me to stay overnight at their homes a few times. When I would come home after being gone all night, Agnes would start hopping around and yelping because she was happy to see me.

I usually sleep on my couch and she slept on the couch with me. I decided to sleep in one of the bedrooms. Agnes was in the living room and she started howling at 3:00 AM. She was unhappy because she couldn't spend the night with her Daddy. After her howling woke me up, I got her and let her sleep in the bed with me the rest of the night.

I have no wife or kids and Agnes was the closest thing I had to a daughter. Her death has broken my heart and I'm going to miss her. She was my baby doll and I owned her for almost seven glorious years. I thanked the good Lord for letting me have her. I was a lucky man.

[KayC]

I am so sorry for your loss.  I too lost my soulmate in a dog, Arlie, to cancer last August, my heart hurts each and every day and everything is a trigger of our shared memories, he was my constant companion, the best dog I ever had.  I wish you peace and comfort in the ensuing time, I know it's a gradual process to adjusting to life without and I haven't reached the point where there's no pain yet, hoping someday the pain will lessen.  Memories sometimes still bring pain as my heart aches for him, but gradually are beginning to bring a smile as I think back over his life.  I wrote about memories of his life (below) and suggest it as a way of getting it all down so that nothing is forgotten, they are precious souls!

Here is our cancer journey: 

and memories of his life: 

 

I want to leave you with this video in the hopes it brings you comfort:

We want to be here for you.

[AJWCat]

So sorry for your loss of sweet Agnes.