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The Dreams and the Waking


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I lost my husband in October 2019 by suicide.  It has been 7 months and I am still plagued by the vivid dreams that leave me sad and weepy.  Mostly, they're of me trying to find him, like he's lost.  Or me trying to get to him and he is just out of reach.  On Sunday the 24th, the 7th month anniversary I had a dream that he was sitting at my dining room table and I was asking him, "are you sure you want to go, I don't want you too" and I was crying.  He looked so so sad.  I know it's part of the process but it's so hard.  

I wake up and have to remember that he is gone.  He is not there to reach out and touch and calm me down.  It's like losing him all over again.  

Is anyone having the same type of dreams.

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I think we've all had those kind at some time or another, it's like our subconscious is still trying to process this, took me a few years.  I'm sorry, I know it's distressing.

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