Not really sure about forums, this is my first..

[BConnell88]

I really don't know much about forums. My husband/my bestfriend passed away 10/31/2010. He was 22. (I am also 22) We got together when we were 12 and have been living together ever since. We had our 10yr anniversary 10/13/2010. He's all I've ever known. He truely was my one and only. I guess I'm still kinda in shock. It doesn't feel real. He passed away suddenly. His grandpa was taken off life support and passed away 10/29/2010. He had a little too much to drink that night and never woke back up. We were in the hospital til halloween when he passed away. I don't have insurance and actually got fired from my job 5 days after he passed so I can not afford to have counseling, Anyways my mom wants me to try talking to people so I thought I'd try to forum to see how it goes. We were completely devoted to each other. I truely don't know how I've even lasted this long without him, it's been a little over 6mths and it's still so unreal. I honestly don't know how to deal with the pain. Everyone tells me it will get easier with time but for me with time it gets worse because it makes it sink in more and more that he's gone and that's just something I am not strong enough to deal with. He was truely my life, my love, my everything. He was the greatest man I could ever know.

[ModKonnie]

I really don't know much about forums. My husband/my bestfriend passed away 10/31/2010. He was 22. (I am also 22) We got together when we were 12 and have been living together ever since. We had our 10yr anniversary 10/13/2010. He's all I've ever known. He truely was my one and only. I guess I'm still kinda in shock. It doesn't feel real. He passed away suddenly. His grandpa was taken off life support and passed away 10/29/2010. He had a little too much to drink that night and never woke back up. We were in the hospital til halloween when he passed away. I don't have insurance and actually got fired from my job 5 days after he passed so I can not afford to have counseling, Anyways my mom wants me to try talking to people so I thought I'd try to forum to see how it goes. We were completely devoted to each other. I truely don't know how I've even lasted this long without him, it's been a little over 6mths and it's still so unreal. I honestly don't know how to deal with the pain. Everyone tells me it will get easier with time but for me with time it gets worse because it makes it sink in more and more that he's gone and that's just something I am not strong enough to deal with. He was truely my life, my love, my everything. He was the greatest man I could ever know.

Hi,

I am very sorry about the loss of your husband. I am sure you are in utter pain and agony. There are many people here who have lost their partner and other loved ones, and they find it healing to talk to people. You have come to a good place. When you are ready, tell us all about your hubby, and feel free to post his picture if you'd like in our gallery.

So, are you looking for another job? Do you live with your mother? Do you have any children?

ModKonnie

[EulogyAdvisor]

I'm sorry for your loss. You grew up with your husband, so being still in shock is understandable. But I think your mom is right. Getting out and talking to people, even on the computer, is a good idea. Even if you don't have a job or money, you can still go to your county mental health services and see if there is a grief group you can join or ask if they know of any community or church groups they can refer you to.

You don't have to be alone, and sometimes pain shared is pain relieved. My heart goes out to you. This is a good group of people, and you'll get a lot of encouragement on your grief journey.

Best wishes, and welcome.

Once loved, always loved--

Fran

I really don't know much about forums. My husband/my bestfriend passed away 10/31/2010. He was 22. (I am also 22) We got together when we were 12 and have been living together ever since. We had our 10yr anniversary 10/13/2010. He's all I've ever known. He truely was my one and only. I guess I'm still kinda in shock. It doesn't feel real. He passed away suddenly. His grandpa was taken off life support and passed away 10/29/2010. He had a little too much to drink that night and never woke back up. We were in the hospital til halloween when he passed away. I don't have insurance and actually got fired from my job 5 days after he passed so I can not afford to have counseling, Anyways my mom wants me to try talking to people so I thought I'd try to forum to see how it goes. We were completely devoted to each other. I truely don't know how I've even lasted this long without him, it's been a little over 6mths and it's still so unreal. I honestly don't know how to deal with the pain. Everyone tells me it will get easier with time but for me with time it gets worse because it makes it sink in more and more that he's gone and that's just something I am not strong enough to deal with. He was truely my life, my love, my everything. He was the greatest man I could ever know.

[honey]

I understand your pain my husband passed away in a motorcycle accident that i was also hurt really badly. I think if I would have not gotten hurt I would have lost my mind by now. He was also my everyth ing we did everything together and I have lots of great memories people were jealous of the relationship me and him mad because we were so close and never really argued we were bestfriends he was my soul mate. My problem is getting motivation to get out of bed every day and get dressed I feel like I have nothing I don't even know where to start without him. My insurance company settled and I did win but it makes it harder because everything we ever worked for and wanted we have the money to do it and he isn't here to talk to or brain storm with. My family has been alot of support and my friends have been trying to get me out of the house and a couple of times i did have fun but most of the time i am just wishing he was there by myside. sorry that i am raven on I really have not talked to anyone about my feelings I have never been one to cry or show emotions and around my family and friends they expect me to be strong because I have always been a very strong person but I honestly think that this broke me and there is alot I have to get out before I really loose it. 1 month after the motorcycle accident where he passed away i passed out in my car and totaled it all anyone can thing is that i blacked out so now it is hard for me to get out the house although i did get a new car my doctor made it clear for me to not be driving that my next chance could be the morgue but it didn't affect me because in my mind that is where I want to be is with him. Now that I have this money I know that he would want me to take care of me and our kids but I really just want to give it all to my kids and live life with no fear and hopefulness that i will get to join him soon. I guess while i commented on your is because I see you have made it 6 months and it gives me hope that I will get through.