Members MommaH23 Posted July 9, 2019 Members Report Posted July 9, 2019 I lost my 2nd child at 22 weeks in November of 2018. These last 7+ months have been torture for my mind. Our child (a girl) had a severely deformed heart, as well as a rare genetic disease and a few other things that would have made her survival rate less than 1%. Her little quality of life would be nil (we're talking brain dead attached to tubes). The entire experience at the hospital was surreal. I had to be induced and it took over 3 days to get me to open up just a tiny bit to give birth. When she was born; I was REALLY hoping we'd hear crying and it'd be a miracle; surely the doctors HAD IT ALL WRONG. I, of course, lied to myself. It went the exact way the medical staff had predicted and it was the most viscous mental pain to date. I've tried everything; reading, talking to relatives, therapists...just can't move on. When I feel genuinely happy, then the guilt sets in. When I'm overwhelmingly sad, I tend to overeat. It's taken a toll on me and it sucks. So, can anyone give any advice? Does this overwhelming feeling end or diminish at some point? I don't think this is fair to my family, they deserve me in a good place. Thanks in advance to anyone who takes the time out to respond.
Members mydeepestthoughts Posted July 20, 2019 Members Report Posted July 20, 2019 I am so sorry to hear about your tragic, an traumatic experiences. In most cases there is no formula for getting over grief. Because of the way we were created, we respond differently to things that happen in our lives. When my mother passed away, each of my siblings handled grief in their own way,and period of time. But there are steps to take that can help our grief to dissipate, which will greatly help us lead better lives, and benefit those around us. One major component of overwhelming grief is a lack of hope. The best way to overcome that is to be concious of our spirituality. Matt 5:3 states "Happy are those conscious of their spiritual needs." Why? Because Hope for the future is the central theme of the Bible. So we will never forget our loss,but because of our hope, we are able to function and live our lives with the remaining ones in our family. Attached Is a brochure that has given me hope for the future..I hope it brings you comfort https://www.jw.org/en/publications/books/know-truth-tract/know-the-truth/ My condolences
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