Love letter to Charlie

[Billie Rae]

Hi babe,

As I try to settle into my new solitary life I cry and wish and rage.

The new home I am creating is so pretty and comfortable,everything is clean and shiny I look at it with pride but not joy.

I'm trying so hard to do and be what you told me you wanted for me,what I wanted for us together.

I can't enjoy it all,I wonder why you had to leave me for me to have this life,it's all built on your death.How I wish you could enjoy this with me and feel how sweet it is,to feel your feet in this soft creamy carpet,the quiet comfort of new walls and the sound of the lady as she sings across the courtyard in the evenings,the children laughing as they play.

To see the kind smiles and cheerful good morning from the neighbors

The kind can I help you?from the staff.

This is the life I always dreamed of,a job I love,a place I love to come to

Only no you.Thank you for sacrificing your life so I can live mine.

I can't enjoy it yet,but I'm trying because you told me to and I hope you see what you did for me

I promise one day I will Learn to not be as sad to honor you with joy,and always hold you close.

I miss you,I miss us

Above all I love you

Your wife

 

Sent from my LG-TP260 using Grieving.com mobile app

 

 

[JES]

@Billie Rae  What a beautiful way to honor Charlie.  It brought me to tears.  I know its been so hard for you, if it helps any, Im proud of you.  Im sorry hes not here with you to enjoy it though.  I am hoping time will allow us to feel joy again....I struggle there also.....  I still talk to Kevin as if he were here, somehow it seems to help me cope.  Thinking of you so many miles away and sending love my friend. Jeanne

[Scott A]

That's a beautiful letter.  I hope you find some comfort writing to your husband.

[KayC]

Billie Rae,

That is very poignant and heartfelt, and I imagine him reading it.  I'm glad you're settled in your place even though you don't feel the joy you would if you could share it with him.  Invite him to sit with you and be with you, Lord knows I have my husband over the years!  Some might think us crazy, but no one here on this board.