Today was my due date for the baby I lost

[CLW]

Hello, I am new to this group. I lost my baby when I was 16 weeks pregnant. Today has been difficult because it was my due date. I have been going through this experience alone, because the father of my baby had too many other personal things going on in his life and left me to deal with things on my own without his support. We found out I was pregnant shortly after he was diagnosed with a pituitary tumor. We are both in our 40’s, divorced and each have 2 children. We didn’t expect to conceive at our age and with the pregnancy complications I was experiencing, the pregnancy was risky for myself and our baby. I lost my baby, I lost someone I loved and cared very much for who now has nothing to do with me like I never existed. It has been very difficult coping alone. I knew today would be difficult and it is hard to keep a smile on my face and pretend I’m ok. I honestly just want to curl up in bed and cry, but I have my daughter who needs me to be there for who. I’m pretty private and I don’t talk about this with many people because I get very emotional. Thank you for your support and reading my story.

[Jesse David & Taylor Mom]

I am sorry for the loss of your baby and having to take that journey alone. Try to self care as best you can.  I am including a link to a grief blog that helped me understand grief after child loss. 

http://stillstandingmag.com/category/miscarriage-2/

Hugs.