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crashintome

losing my ex

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crashintome

My high school sweet heart my best friend killed himself by hanging himself his his childhood home ( our old house) he took some pills & some jack Daniels and went upstairs to the attic & killed himself. I wonder what thoughts went through his head... did he think about the old us??? He had a drug problem while we were together that's why it didn't work out but I never stopped loving him.

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Sirog1

Hi.  Not sure if I will be able to give you any insight and am sure I will probably confuse you even further and I will apologise for this in advance.  I can only speak as a person that has been toying with the idea of suicide and it is not something that anyone will take lightly. Your friend must have been in a lot of mental anguish to resort to suicide, I do not think that there is just one thing that drives one over the edge. The multitude of bad experiences that he might have experienced and not been able to convey this to anyone because of stigma, shame, being an introvert, loneliness...the only thing I can say to you is that he did this for a reason and you should respect that.  You will never find the answers to why he did this as it was probably a spurr of the moment thing.  Most people who toy with death - me included, will not show signs of depression and will think of suicide, hope that we can leave notes or something behind to make people feel better but to be honest what can you say!!??  I have tried to write many suicide notes and have burned all of them as I know that it doesn't make it easier for them, only me.  A person who commits suicide is a person that needed help but wasnt able to ask for it in time - or didi not receive it in time.  Let him go, he's probably happier now than what he was when he was alive.

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budd2119

I have to agree with most of that. There is no way I can let go though I wish I could. I am learning to live with all that has happened. We will never understand why they couldn't be saved.

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