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i ve had to say good bye to many family members bc of their toxicness

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sheela

my mother passed away last year june 6th at home from CHF and emphysema.. i was her caregiver for 13 years... i am hurting very deeply and have had to say good bye basically to my aunt and a cousin and a half sister .... i guess i always knew they were crummy and werent family but since my mom is gone it just really has hit home.. there are a varity of reasons for this i dont want to go into them here as it hurts to much to right now.. but i just needed to vent.. i dont have any family left since my mom is gone for what it is worth.. i also have no friends other than online.. i am very lonely.. and alone..

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raichel

You wrote this awhile ago..so I am hoping you're feeling a little easier by now.

I just wanted to write and say that..you're not alone. Not really. Everything you mentioned in your post is something I have already gone through. There are millions of us out here that all feel the same way. Except..everyone is afraid nowadays. Afraid to really act human..I guess. Anyway..I sincerely wish you have found some happiness in your life. And I know exactly how you feel.

When I felt down..my mother used to say that "This may be a bad day Raichel..but wait..tomorrow's another day.. and it will be better."

Feelings come and go..it's alot like riding a roller coaster.

When you take those scary dips..you just have to hold on a little tighter!

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sheela

thank you rachel i know what u mean, with family like this who needs enemies is how i still feel, as time has come and went  things with those family members only got so much WORSE. they just keep showing metheir true colors ! so needless to say i dont have anything further to do with them at all. and i mean at all.

they would stab me in the back in a heartbeat. i would never do that to them but still i know how they are at least i guess. and my mom knew this all the time when she was alive to. she never talked to them hardly at all ever.

 

thanks for your time and your reply - how are you by the way - i hope that things are going as well as can for you, i know for me they are very hard at times bc i miss my mother so much see, she passed away last year in June and her b day was just this august 3rd so a very hard time for me, except that i have a boyfriend who supports me so much, i am so amazed that i found someone like him at all. and i met him online to at moco space LOL

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sheela

as far as i am concered My guy Mercedes can be all the family that i ever need along with my dad & sister & aunt & of course  1 or 2 close friends and thats all i ever need. ever. those crummy relatives can go to heck. i never need them ever again. not ever. i never needed them to begin with. here right after my mom passes away i had to get a legal aid attorney to fix some legal papers its such a long story but if i hadnt done that, than when my moms and her sisters house sell's if it ever does, i wouldnt have gotten my share ever at all. so after my mom passed away here i had to rush and hurry the heck up and fix those papers with a lawyer or lose my share. thats how crummy those relatives are. so sad. for them and for me to. bc when people are that way they hurt themselves and those around them too.

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raichel

So happy for you Sheela!:)

We all go through so much in life..but..my mother taught me that  when things get tough..if you can manage to hold on..you can find happiness again!

As far as relatives..it is sad that being blood related doesn't necessarily guarantee that they will be loving. If they continue to do harm..you have to learn to protect yourself and build up a wall to shut them out. I know you wish it could be different..but sometimes.. you just can't make them understand how much they hurt you.

In any case..I wish you sunshine all the time!:cool:

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sheela

TY all for your kind words my guy has moved in with me as of the end of july and we are together and are so happy together as well  i see more and more every day that i just dont need those crummy people in my life at all !!!

 

and i am healing too from losing my mother i am starting to celebrate life again and will always love her but need to continue in life and she and i both know this... i even had a dream like thing one day where some one said to me your mother is moving on and is happy and wants the same for you too. it was like so feeing like i needed to hear that. i think i kept trying to bring her back with my grief. i needed to hear that she was ok and was moving forowrd.. it was my permission to gon and be happy again etc..  i felt so badly for not taking her to the hospital one last time to save her etc but she had said that she never wanted another hospital again and there really was nohope as she was 67 and had severe CHF and lung failure as well was a heavy smoker  for so many years also.. but i saw a butterfly one day on a girls back pack it was a pretty rainbow colored thing and i heard a though in my head say thank you for not letting me suffer and for letting me go i am now like that butterfly.... FREE

i had to shead a few tears but i was so comforted by this there is no way to describe it at all.. 

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Kelly

Dear Members,

We are excited to mention that we are moving to a more new and improved message boards on MONDAY MORNING AUGUST 9th! The boards will be done for a few hours while we are making the conversation. Remember we posted information about this move a month ago. For some of you this might seem a bit sudden,  but when we were reviewing the site we determined the current message board you are using is out of date and the company that designed it is no longer in existence. The good news is this new message board will have new features that have been requested in the past like more fields we can add to your profiles and a chat room up to 20 people at one time. If we find the chat room is bursting at the seams we will add additional room for extra people. All your old posts, private messages and such will be migrated to the new message board. You might have to put up your profile picture again but not sure. The new company will be doing the migration for us. Here is a short list of some of the new features on the board:

- Custom Profile Fields

- Users can customize their profile pages by selecting a background color or background image, with tiling options.

- Facebook and Twitter Integration

- users can respond to multiple posts at once with "mini-quote"

- Pinned discussion threads - like welcome to our board etc.

- Announcements made across some boards or the entire message board

- Search: Users can easily find all content generated by a particular member, by clicking the 'Find Content' button that appears on the main profile page, or in the Mini Profile Popup which can be accessed throughout the board. The results page allows content to be filtered by application, as well whether the member created it or merely participated in it.

- Privacy: allows users to sign in anonymously, hiding them from the online users list. Users also have the option to disable personal conversations and user-to-user emails, as well as ignore other users if necessary.

The next exciting piece of news about the new message board is it will have a new domain name of www.grieving.com for search engine optimization purposes. It will still be apart of Beyond Indigo and can be found through www.beyondindigo.com. We will be redirecting your current URL's to this new domain name but we might miss a few. If that is the case simply go back to www.grieving.com or www.beyondindigo.com to find your message board thread. We will try to make the transition as seamless as possible.

The bottom line is the new board will give us room to grow our community and more options to interact better with each other.

If you have any questions please direct them to feedback@beyondindigo.com.

Kelly Baltzell, MA

CEO/President

Beyond Indigo Family

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adc

I pray that you're doing better. You are not alone. Visit this board and talk to others who are experiencing the same type of situations.

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