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Incarcerated Friend has lost His dog


kcstaleys

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My Friends son is a recently incarcerated Young Adult who is in correctional rehab for a DUI/with an outstanding warrant for his arrest for breaking previous probation...his dog who was his best friend died unexpectedly yesterday morning....my friend does not know how or when to tell him as he is in an 84 day treatment and she is afraid that he will not be able to stay focused on his treatment with this shocking news....so my question is....

when should she tell him? Now or wait until he is home in about 3 months...?

Thank you for any help that anyone can give me....have a great day...

kccarol

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My Friends son is a recently incarcerated Young Adult who is in correctional rehab for a DUI/with an outstanding warrant for his arrest for breaking previous probation...his dog who was his best friend died unexpectedly yesterday morning....my friend does not know how or when to tell him as he is in an 84 day treatment and she is afraid that he will not be able to stay focused on his treatment with this shocking news....so my question is....

when should she tell him? Now or wait until he is home in about 3 months...?

Thank you for any help that anyone can give me....have a great day...

kccarol

KCCarol,

Well, I work in a prison therapeutic community for addicts. When my clients are told bad news from home, we are very supportive and encouraging. Usually they do okay and end up talking about it and sharing their feelings instead of bottling things up as they did on the outside of prison. I've had client's parents, grandparents, friends, pets, etc., die while they are incacerated. It is tough for them, but usually they are told when it happens.

Hope this helps,

ModKonnie

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Mommysangelisabella

I hv delt with men who hv been in prison for a long time. My exhusband to be exact. We had a conversation about this type of thing as well as he has with other inmates and the going word is tell him now. He said hed rather know his mom dad ect died now and deal with the loss than to come home expecting this person . In this case his dog wich im assuming in like a brother , child , or bestfriend. Its better to,deal with the loss in a controled situation where he dosent hv the option of going out and getting drunk after finding out after he gets home. Ive been told many times that inmates still wish to be a full part of their familys life every up and down. So many people think its best to wait wich i understand truly i do. But words from another inmate in for drugs is tell me right away . If i was to come home and find out id get mad. Inmates are good people in the most part they are just lost and hv made mistakes. With hard work he can come home healed from this loss and ready to make amense for his mistakes but it will take time. These are just my thoughts and thoughts of another inmates plz take as much as you can from this My prayers are with you all im here if you wish to email me.

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Ouch and confused

I don't think I would.  Jail is a really scary and violent place so you don't want him to lash out and get into something there that could have him serving a longer sentence.  He will be mad when he gets out and finds out that you didn't tell him, but don't want him angry and upset there.  

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Ouch and confused

Okaymama didn't see your post and I you know too.   But for only that long, that is hard to deal with in jail.  For years of a sentence, you do want to know.  But not that short of time.

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Ouch and confused

My opinion though.  It is hard to understand what and when you need to be heard in jail when bad things happen. 

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