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I’m 52 and an only child single with no children of my own. I lost my mom September 29, 2021. She had had dementia for years. It was hard but also a relief. But yesterday I found my father passed away. He had been declining but there was no reason to  think it would’ve been so sudden. I am very much in shock and need answers to some of the things in my head right now. For example the thought of turning on the TV frightens me because I think I’ll see something that reminds me of him or that I would want to talk to him about. I’m afraid to turn the lights out. I’m afraid to drive because my dad always maintained my vehicles for me and I don’t know what I will do if it breaks down. And that seems silly because I have AAA but it all comes down to this fear that I can’t get beyond. Has anyone else encountered it? How do you work through it? Is it not fear is it something else?

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Dear LGS,

I am so sorry for your loss. It is normal and natural to feel this way after losing both your parents. Part of the grief you are feeling. I think it would help to talk to a grief counsellor or therapist or seek out a support group in the community. I also found these websites helpful. Grief in Common. Grief Healing Blog. Grief Share. What's Your Grief.

I would also suggest this website Aging Care for additional supports.

Keep taking it day by day for now. Thinking of you.

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