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My kitten got ran over and died!!


Lara247

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Lara247

As I type im Crying my heart out! Leo got accidently ran over by my brother today! Leo was 7 months old absolutely full of life only started going out last few weeks and had a habit of hiding under cars. Unfortunately my brother came over to visit and as he drove off he felt something and there Leo was gasping for air he had no chance he took him into the house hysterical and we watched him gasp for air and die! Took him to the vet praying they can do CPR but no chance he was dead on arrival. I have cried so so much today I feel my chest hurts. My brother has been hysterical and can’t stop crying and he’s a full grown man!! I am broken beyond belief. He was so so loved and had the kindest personality ever loved kids loved rain loved thunder loved life. I had a cat for 14 years who died in December got Leo in February now he’s dead? I have lost 2 cats in 7 months my heart can’t take it anymore. I mean 7 months?! His life just started. I buried him in an open field and placing his once energetic limp body into the soil killed me. His once pink nose turned snownwhite and his paws were all white gave him one last kiss and cuddle and down into the soil he went. Will this pain go? My first cat max as he was 14 years older age I was broken but never like this. Leo had the best personality ever and I’m afraid will never find a cat that matches his loving personality . I am so so so so so so so so so upset my brother blames himself but it was unfortunate to the max.

I keep smelling his collar wishing I gave him more milk this morning he was the Perfect kitten and I can’t seem to shake this pain off so so raw.

I beg someone to tell me that this pain shall pass. I wish this is a nightmare that I wake up from and he’s waiting for me for his biscuits

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Yes the pain will eventually lessen in intensity to something you can more easily bear...thankfully, although I can't say when, it's different for all of us.  I lost my sweet husband 16 years ago and I can't even tell you how it slammed med!  It was sudden/unexpected and my life/world was never the same again.  But I've learned to live with my grief.  I just shared these tips with someone else and feel compelled to share them with you...not a one-size-fits-all as we're all unique, but see if anything helps and grasp it.  One thing that helped me the most was taking one day (sometimes hour/minute) at a time.  

I am so sorry for your loss, I know the pain is incredible.

Accidental Death
Comfort for Grieving Animal Lovers

I want to share an article I wrote of the things I've found helpful over the years, in the hopes something will be of help to you either now or on down the road.

TIPS TO MAKE YOUR WAY THROUGH GRIEF

There's no way to sum up how to go on in a simple easy answer, but I encourage you to read the other threads here, little by little you will learn how to make your way through this.  I do want to give you some pointers though, of some things I've learned on my journey.

  • Take one day at a time.  The Bible says each day has enough trouble of it's own, I've found that to be true, so don't bite off more than you can chew.  It can be challenging enough just to tackle today.  I tell myself, I only have to get through today.  Then I get up tomorrow and do it all over again.  To think about the "rest of my life" invites anxiety.
  • Don't be afraid, grief may not end but it evolves.  The intensity lessens eventually.
  • Visit your doctor.  Tell them about your loss, any troubles sleeping, suicidal thoughts, anxiety attacks.  They need to know these things in order to help you through it...this is all part of grief.
  • Suicidal thoughts are common in early grief.  If they're reoccurring, call a suicide hotline.  I felt that way early on, but then realized it wasn't that I wanted to die so much as I didn't want to go through what I'd have to face if I lived.  Back to taking a day at a time.  Suicide Hotline - Call 1-800-273-8255 or www.crisis textline.org or US and Canada: text 741741 UK: text 85258 | Ireland: text 50808
  • Give yourself permission to smile.  It is not our grief that binds us to them, but our love, and that continues still.
  • Try not to isolate too much.  
  • There's a balance to reach between taking time to process our grief, and avoiding it...it's good to find that balance for yourself.  We can't keep so busy as to avoid our grief, it has a way of haunting us, finding us, and demanding we pay attention to it!  Some people set aside time every day to grieve.  I didn't have to, it searched and found me!
  • Self-care is extremely important, more so than ever.  That person that would have cared for you is gone, now you're it...learn to be your own best friend, your own advocate, practice self-care.  You'll need it more than ever.
  • Recognize that your doctor isn't trained in grief, find a professional grief counselor that is.  We need help finding ourselves through this maze of grief, knowing where to start, etc.  They have not only the knowledge, but the resources.
  • In time, consider a grief support group.  If your friends have not been through it themselves, they may not understand what you're going through, it helps to find someone somewhere who DOES "get it". 
  • Be patient, give yourself time.  There's no hurry or timetable about cleaning out belongings, etc.  They can wait, you can take a year, ten years, or never deal with it.  It's okay, it's what YOU are comfortable with that matters.  
  • Know that what we are comfortable with may change from time to time.  That first couple of years I put his pictures up, took them down, up, down, depending on whether it made me feel better or worse.  Finally, they were up to stay.
  • Consider a pet.  Not everyone is a pet fan, but I've found that my dog helps immensely.  It's someone to love, someone to come home to, someone happy to see me, someone that gives me a purpose...I have to come home and feed him.  Besides, they're known to relieve stress.  Well maybe not in the puppy stage when they're chewing up everything, but there's older ones to adopt if you don't relish that stage.
  • Make yourself get out now and then.  You may not feel interest in anything, things that interested you before seem to feel flat now.  That's normal.  Push yourself out of your comfort zone just a wee bit now and then.  Eating out alone, going to a movie alone or church alone, all of these things are hard to do at first.  You may feel you flunked at it, cried throughout, that's okay, you did it, you tried, and eventually you get a little better at it.  If I waited until I had someone to do things with I'd be stuck at home a lot.
  • Keep coming here.  We've been through it and we're all going through this together.
  • Look for joy in every day.  It will be hard to find at first, but in practicing this, it will change your focus so you can embrace what IS rather than merely focusing on what ISN'T.  It teaches you to live in the present and appreciate fully.  You have lost your big joy in life, and all other small joys may seem insignificant in comparison, but rather than compare what used to be to what is, learn the ability to appreciate each and every small thing that comes your way...a rainbow, a phone call from a friend, unexpected money, a stranger smiling at you, whatever the small joy, embrace it.  It's an art that takes practice and is life changing if you continue it.
  • Eventually consider volunteering.  It helps us when we're outward focused, it's a win/win.

(((hugs))) Praying for you today.

 

 

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How devastating. I am so heartbroken to read this for you all. And most of all your sweet kitten. 

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