Grieving partner--when to seek help?

[AndyDesertRat]

Hi everyone,

First time here. Hoping for some thoughtful input from those who have either gone through a grieving process themselves, or supported someone they love through it.

My partner lost her son tragically three months ago. While I know this is all very fresh and new and raw to her, I worry greatly about her. She stays up for days, sleeps and eats at completely different times every day/days, and has begun to use obsessive coping strategies. She binges Netflix and Hulu literally for days to distract herself, and has been using a lot more marijuana and alcohol to numb herself from the pain. She isn't working right now, so that sense of purpose and regimen is not present. I know that all of this may pass, but I am very worried that she is entering into a dangerous cycle or damaging habits that will soon be difficult to change. Can anyone relate to this, or have thoughts on our situation? Please and thank you, blessings.

[reader]

Dear Andy,

I'm sorry someone has not posted a reply sooner. I am so sorry for your partner's loss. It is a devastating time and you're so good to care for her. 

Has she considered grief counselling? Or joining a grief support group?

Grief in Common has Zoom grief support meetings.

I know it's hard to see someone go through such a difficult time. Everyone's grief journey is so different and we all do different things to get through each day. I hope talking to a grief therapist will help her.

[AndyDesertRat]

Thanks so much for your response. Yes, I feel strongly that that is something that could help. But...Any mention or gentle suggestion of therapy or group meetings sets her into a rageful defensive attitude. She readily denounces any benefit from therapy and attacks those who mention it as questioning her mental stability. I think those around her during her upbringing were fairly anti counseling and "self sufficient". Uggg, what to do?!