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Guilt


Simply Scentiment

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Simply Scentiment

My baby was 9 months old when she was senselessly murdered by her father. I think about her every single day. I never got the chance to see her go to kindergarten,  and especially celebrate  Christmas and her Birthday together.  She was born on Christmas day and I definitely struggle on that day. How I've been channeling my grief is by hosting Christmas dinner at my house and showering family with gifts especially those that have children since I'm unable to give to my baby. It normally brings joy on the outside while tearing me up on the inside. I strongly want to do something for grieving mothers by starting a Gift Giving Grief Self Care Box for Holidays, Anniversaries or special days. I just love to bring a smile to someone face even if it's for a brief moment. But whenever I take one step forward guilt takes over and overwhelms me. Lately I been blaming myself for my baby father murdering her. That particular day I ran out of medication and left the house to go to the store to purchase more. I feel like ONLY if I had taken her with me or had extra medicine my baby would still be alive. I don't want to feel selfish by not following my passion for other mothers but this feeling is eating me up inside.

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Shirley24

Sorry for your loss. I lost my 11 yr old son to a car accident in which I was driving. The guilt is eating me up inside. I should have been more careful driving, I should have made sure he was wearing his seatbelt before we drove off. All the different scenarios could have saved my son and still be hear with us. The pain is  most of the time unbearable and I keep wishing to just be with my son/bestfriend again. His birthday is on 6/24 and its been a lot harder than usual. 

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