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Bipolar dealing with regret and denial/covid


Tarsha

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I lost my Nan on the 15th and it would have been her 70th birthday today. She was the woman who raised me and my Mom passed away 4 years ago so she was my shoulder to cry on. Ever since my Mom died she had been getting sick. She had been sick but I didn't realize how bad it was.. I hadn't seen her hardly at all cause of Covid and it hurts so much knowing I could have spent those last months with her and not worrying about Covid as much. It happened fast and I wasn't ready at all.

I didn't realize till now that I was in denial that it was so bad because I didn't wanna even think about another loved one dying. I feel so bad about it not being there for her more and trying to get her new doctors. I have bipolar disorder and had seasonal depression so I wasn't in my right mind.

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Dear Tarsha,

I'm so sorry for your loss. My deepest sympathies and condolences.

I know it's been incredibly hard with Covid and you did the best you could under the circumstances. 

Thinking of you.

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Valerie Lockhart

Dear Tarsha,

I'm sorry for your loss. Please understand that you are not the cause for your loved ones' deaths. Even though we may have the best intentions, some things are beyond our control. Sometimes you cannot change your circumstances, but you can change the way you view them. Despite the anxiety you feel, think of three things in your life or about your loved ones that you are thankful for. You can also keep a journal in which you can write about the emotions you feel, what triggered them, and how you might deal with them. The Bible is a strengthening aid for many who suffer from “disquieting thoughts.” (Psalm 94:17-19, 22) There, the psalmist states about God’s appointed King, Jesus Christ: “He will deliver the poor one crying for help, also the afflicted one and whoever has no helper. He will feel sorry for the lowly one and the poor one, and the souls of the poor ones he will save.” The Bible also promises that in God’s new world, “no resident will say: ‘I am sick.’” (Isaiah 33:24) Gone will be the distressing ailments and maladies that plague so many today. It is indeed heartwarming to contemplate God’s promise of a new world in which all illnesses—including mood disorders—will be gone forever. At that time, says the Bible, no longer will there be mourning or outcry or pain.— (Revelation 21:4)

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Harmeet

Dear Tarsha,

I know both your loved ones had lots of love for you and cared very much for you. They’re still with you spiritually and guide you through life as you make life’s decisions. You couldn’t have known the condition your loved one was in, and with the circumstances I know you did the best you could’ve. Sending healing hugs and hoping you find closure. Stay strong <3

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