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I can’t get over my father’s death


Jessica_623

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Jessica_623

My father died in November 2019. I can’t get over it. I’m always on the verge of tears. I’m afraid to bring it up to family members in case they’re having a good day or moving on with their lives. I’m afraid to bring it up to my friends because I’m afraid they will think “just get over it already.” My father and I had our ups and downs, so I wonder if my feelings are valid and if I should be this upset. But I miss him so much and wish I could take things back and say things to him that I was afraid to say. I’m filled with so much regret and guilt.

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Dear Jessica,

It's devastating to lose a beloved father. It's not something to get over easily or move on from. The more people deny our feelings and fail to listen and support us, the harder it is to cope. Please know your feelings are real and valid. I too feel as you do and 5 years on still feel much regret and guilt. It's something that has stayed with me, but I am grateful that I have this forum to share my feelings. I hope you have trusted friends or family or a  grief support group or counsellor for that.

This website has some online support groups:

Grief in Common

Thinking of you. (((hugs)))

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crudebliss

Hi Jessica, I would like to tell you two things.... If you feel you need to say something to him... Do so... Just now... Pour your heart out... And say it in your mind, we are part of a web made of a cosmic fabric that is interwoven with everyone in time and we do communicate with the dial tone being love... I know you will get him online. Secondly, you need to know that his soul is journeying on, towards the truth, towards love towards wisdom... You need to feel this in your heart, and I know you do... Send him your well wishes and he shall feel them too, no point of grieving for him as just a body, but learn to see him as a soul who came in your existential time, made you, and left you with a beautiful gift of his memory. Keep it with you, all the good bits, and send out the prayers and regrets to him once and for all; he will send you the love back in affirmation.

 

 

 

 

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