The loss of my Grandma... My Best Friend

[Alissabrownie]

In 2015, I was 11 years old, my Mom and I were working at a school function. Then my Mom got a phone call, the phone call I’ll never forget. My Grandpa called and he was in tears crying for help and I could hear his voice quivering. My Mom and I got in the car and drove to my grandma’s house. I still didn’t know what happened and I was scared out of my mind. I asked my Mom what happened, and she looked at me. I saw tears falling down her face. She then said “ Something happened to Grandma”. My heart stopped and I burst into tears and I felt my soul being ripped from my body. 
 

We arrived at my grandma’s house and my Grandpa was kneeling on the ground crying. I ran to the house with tears, but my Mom grabbed my wrist and told me not to go in. I screamed and kicked while my Grandpa’s neighbors carried me away to their house. I sat and waited in their living room window watching My grandma’s house. Then I saw lights flashing, Red And Blue. It was an the ambulance truck. I cried and lowered my head. I looked up and saw my dad pulling into the driveway and he carried my sister into the neighbor’s house and she was scared. I new that I had to be there for her so I distracted her with a puzzle and some chocolate chip cookies. But after that I head back to the window. That was the worst thing I’ve ever seen in my life, I saw a long metal stretcher carrying my grandma out of the house....With a white cloth over her face and body. That was the moment I knew she was gone. That’s when I knew I lost my best friend. That’s when I lost a half of my heart and soul. 
 

I am now 17 years old and I’m a Junior in High School. I struggle with the trauma and grief from that day 24/7. I cry myself to sleep at night grieving my Grandma’s Death. We were so close. We had so much in common. We loved to sing together, tell stories, laugh at jokes, talk about school, and she gave me the strength to do well in school! I don’t know what to do. I’m really having a hard time with my life now and it’s starting to hurt me in school and everyday life.

[reader]

Dear Alissa,

I'm so sorry to hear of the pain and sorrow you are feeling for your beloved grandma. It's really hard to lose someone we love and to deal with our grief. 

It's important to have someone to talk to and work through our feelings and trauma. Is there a trusted school counsellor or teacher that could help you connect with some resources in the community?

I also found these online resources helpful

What's Your Grief

Grief in Common

Grief Healing Blog

Grief Share

What's Your Grief

Grief in Common has online support groups that might help you. 

Thinking of you.