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1 full month


borbzgirl

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So it has been a full month. I am still crying almost all hours during the day, and as I lay in bed at night. I still feel so much pain. I always beg that he visit me in dreams...

The other day, I had 6 photos of him submitted to a local artist to be sketched. I'll hang them in frames all over my house. I need to see him all the time to feel comforted, at least I'm hoping I will be. He was really the only one capable of comforting me. He was my listening ear, my shoulder to lean on, my go-to person to feel better when I was down, even the outlet of my cruel outbursts everytime I was angry about something. He was the only one who really knew ME. Who really saw ME. And I feel like, it was vice versa... We were each other's foundation. My life is so hollow now.

He gave so much to the world, but it gave nothing back. It didn't know his real value. I think I'm the only one who really knows.... Just how precious he really was.... That he deserved sooooooo much than what he got. He deserved every good thing that this world is able to offer, but we would have settled with just dying old. That would have been okay. But this world is selfish, unfair and blind.

IMG_20210209_155505.jpg

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I'm so sorry for your loss. Those early days are the hardest. I won't say it ever gets easy, but it does get easiER. I know it sounds impossible, but you can do this.

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borbzgirl, We're all here for you and for each other, to share the pain and grief you're going through right now. You're so right when you say the world is a cruel, unjust and selfish place. If it wasn't, then your man would still be here with you now, and so would my woman who was so cruelly taken from me in November. Take good care of yourself, let the tears flow when they have to. In time your heart will start to feel a bit lighter. And, if you believe like I do, look forward to the day you'll be reunited with the love of your life once again. God bless you.
 

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I am sorry it hurts so much, but I know that it does...you are doing what brings you comfort and I'm glad for that.  I also contacted a photographer we'd hired before he died but alas he discarded the negatives already so I couldn't get the other poses I'd wanted.  :(  Your idea to hire an artist is a great idea, are you having this photo done?  It's a great picture.

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What a handsome young man.  Way too young to have passed from this earth but, no one is ever really old enough not to be missed.

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