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My Mother


BEQUET93

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I lost my mother on November 2, 2020, only five weeks after learning she had pancreatic cancer. I lost my father in 1994 and my beloved grandmother in 2008, but this one is hitting me hard, because it was mom. Several years ago, she came to live with me and the house is so quiet without her. Last evening, the urn finally arrived and I have her cremains on a shelf in the living room, where she passed. When hospice was started, I was hoping we would have at least a few good months, but it didn't happen that way. Even before she moved in, we still saw each other or talked almost every day. When I was at the university, I heard more than once that I needed "cut the cord", "cut the apron strings", etc. I regret nothing. I desperately miss her, but I am glad I got to be a mama's boy for 45 years.

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Dear Bequet,

My deepest sympathies and condolences. I'm so sorry for your loss. You're a good son and you loved your mom and supported her and that is what matters. I too spent a lot of time with my parents. I thought that would ease the ache when my father passed but it made it even more devastating. Be kind and gentle with yourself. It will take time to grieve your beloved mother. 

We are with you.

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Dear Bequet,

I’m sure your Mum loved having you there as her Mama’s boy for 45 years too. Hold her in your heart and put one foot in front of the other. That is all we can do right now. 

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Thank you all. It was a difficult weekend, but I am back at work, even if I am getting through the night by posting here.

My father died of bone cancer, my grandma of kidney cancer, and my mother of pancreatic cancer. Even though all cancer is horrible, I will agree that pancreatic cancer is the worst. My God, even with the medication, she endured so much. I am trying to find purpose in all of this by telling people about pancreatic cancer. I want them to know more than that it is what killed Alex Trebek. If we had known the symptoms, she might have actually had a year, rather than five weeks.

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