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Dey

Lost my husband suddenly...

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Monaron

I have a place where people gather in a virtual service. All are real people including the minister and I need this right now. We are the church , not a building. So let the president or anyone else say we cant gather because if we have faith we will find a way. I go and hear live music, the word of God and words from he minister that always seem to touch me.  its the one place I can come where I find comfort. Now Im not saying that real gatherings is not important because it is, but for me I gather with a group of people who believe and get comfort from that. Im 8 weeks grieving now and I needed something and found it through God. 

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KayC
12 hours ago, foreverhis said:

The president's claim that he'd "override" the governors is simply bluster.  Some people seem to think that he could use emergency powers for that, but it's not true.  The emergency powers as written are very narrowly defined.  Even when the state and local governments give the go ahead, it will be up to places of worship to decide what's right for them and their congregations.

I realize that.  That's why I said:

 

22 hours ago, KayC said:

we are waiting for the governor to address it

I don't feel I can be without church indefinitely.  Church is more than just faith, it's also the fellowship of other believers.  There is a lot to it, that's why the Bible says not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together.  Of course we never had COVID-19 in Bible times, but I miss church and my friends there more than I can express.  They are family.  Some are shut in with their family, I am not, being alone day after day for 2 1/2 months has been tough.  The phone doesn't even ring any more.

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foreverhis

@KayC  Hi Kay.  I just wanted to put that out there because there's been so much confusion about it.  So many people think that the president does have that authority that it's causing quite a lot of anger.  And IMO (and most people's, I think) anger has no place in bringing people together for services.  We're naturally all frustrated and distraught at times, which is an entirely different thing.  But when people arm up and go storming in demanding that places of worship be allowed to open, I shake my head and wonder how they can reconcile the peace and comfort of church with brandishing fire arms and threatening people's lives.

I think that places of worship are far more essential than, say, bars or hair salons or sporting events, so I hope that the state and local governments will address it sooner, rather than later.  Putting restrictions and requirements such as face masks, no sharing/bare hands for communion, non-contact fellowship moments, etc. would go a long way toward making it safer. 

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foreverhis
2 hours ago, KayC said:

I don't feel I can be without church indefinitely.  Church is more than just faith, it's also the fellowship of other believers.  There is a lot to it, that's why the Bible says not to forsake the assembling of ourselves together.  Of course we never had COVID-19 in Bible times, but I miss church and my friends there more than I can express.  They are family.  Some are shut in with their family, I am not, being alone day after day for 2 1/2 months has been tough.  The phone doesn't even ring any more.

These past few months really have tested us, haven't they?  Everyone, but especially those of us shut in alone.  I'm sorry to hear that you aren't even hearing from them these days.  I hope that you are able to safely return to your fellowship soon.

I get quite irked when people whine about not being able to go out to dinner or a bar or to get their hair cut, etc.  Sure, we all want to be able to do that safely.  But let's address more urgent needs and how to do things safely there first.  Places of worship and schools top my list.

And I truly wasn't "calling you out" on the president and his "orders."  But there really has been so much confusion causing extreme anger as well as nasty snark, that I think it's important we all keep clear on who is responsible for what, besides of course our personal responsibility toward others.  I also think that local governments should have some say so in it, while keeping in mind that the virus doesn't honor city, county, or state lines or country borders.  What affects one, affects all at this point. 

I do wish some of the more insistent religious leaders wouldn't spout things like, "God will protect us from the virus" (like the one I saw on television who "blew" on the virus and told his congregation they were safe) or "We're going to gather and hug and have physical contact no matter what anyone says" (disregarding statistics and science).  That's selfish and these days endangers the lives of others.  Not only that it denies that with free will and freedom come the responsibilities of selflessness, compassion and concern for the lives of others.

I think it's going to take a long time to find a balance again.

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KayC
On 5/24/2020 at 10:59 AM, foreverhis said:

I also think that local governments should have some say so in it

Absolutely!  Who knows better than our local gov't how things are here and if it's ready, and if so, how much?  I try to look at things from all sides.  Our pastor posted something on FB yesterday, it helped people see the quandary they are in...

 

On 5/24/2020 at 10:59 AM, foreverhis said:

I think it's going to take a long time to find a balance again.

For sure.  And things may very well never be entirely the same again.  

pastoral quandary.jpg

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Monaron

Nothing is never the same. As people settle into their own routines they think or feel nothing changes, but in fact all changes all the time. We have changed in our grieving. We are not the same people we were before and so why do we think because of this big mess called a virus all will go back to normal./ What is normal? Listen to the song by Quincy Jones. (Everything must change). I don know of his life but he speaks of this in the song. This was one of our favorite songs to listen to. Little did I know how it would apply to my life now. The one thing I have learned is that nothing is constant  or unchanging in life but God. Right now its me and God and I see it that way. Maybe in this grieving process and make no mistake Im still here, I will come through a better person. That does not mean things will be great, but changed and just maybe I will be a better person. God bless to all. 

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Dey

I've been down these past few days. I never thought that my family whom I thought were supportive, they have disagreement with my decision. They thought it's not good to live on my own and with me and my son only, they want me to live and move back to my parent's house. I mean, I'm an adult, I have my own place, relatively financial independent, but still they want me to move back and live with my parent? I don't think so. It's so hard being a widow in asian culture. It might not really bother me if the one talking is not my close family. 

 

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Monaron

Sweet Dey, What I have found is that in these days that we are going through catering and listening to all who think what is best for us. You are a grown women and that has not changed . What has changed is now your are a grown widow raising a son on your ow. Its a hard road but its your road. Moving back with any family is beyond my thinking. You need to find  your way with your son without interference. You know what is best for both of you. ITs hard enough to be a woman and I hear what you are saying about being an Asian women, but we all come from somewhere. Everyone. so do what is best for you and your son. Family means well but they do not always know what is best for you. They know you are the girl before marriage and a home of your own. Your no longer that girl Now your re a grown woman with a son who need to be loved and to learn about his father in the best way. Who better than you to teach him. Hand strong what ever that means and God bless. Sending a big hug!

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Dey

Thank you @Monaron for the encouragement. I know they meant well, but I also know I can't do what they expect me to do. At down time like this I really wish my husband are still here with me, he's my biggest supporter, my rock. <<hugs>>

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KayC

Stick to your guns.  I agree with Monaron, you know best.  Follow what you know is right for you and your son.  They raised you but now must trust you to do the right thing.  I wish they weren't tearing at you, I know that's hard.  (((hugs)))

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