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Her birthday 3.26.2020


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I haven't even had time to process that it's your birthday today.  92, that's how old you would be.  I'm grateful you left this world though.  I couldn't bear you going through the world right now.  Some days you are always on my mind.  Other days, I hardly think of you at all.  And that is so shameful.  You deserve more than that.  I feel so disconnected and I want to turn to you but you're not there.  You are not here.  How can I be in this world and you are not?  It makes no sense.  At all.  I remember so much but nothing at all.  This battle of grief is hard to figure out.  Unexpected battles for the domination of my feelings.  I'm tired of putting on a show for all to see.  92...92 in the world today.  I'm glad you went home three years ago. 

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Nicole-my grief journey

Thinking of you. You have my deepest empathy. I have similar feelings and I know anniversaries/ birthdays are so hard. I have had the feelings you have too. Big hug. 

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