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Recently breakup


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Countrygirllost

I recently broke up with a man I loved very much. Unfortunately, he’s still a part of my everyday life. I’m grieving the loss of him and this relationship very deeply. Not being able to complete get away is making it more difficult. This has brought up some old abandonment scars I should have addressed a long time ago. This time, I’m trying to heal the right way. It’s hard with a lack of support. Let’s face it, for some reason our society doesn’t think we should grieve break ups. In reality, sometimes it’s worse than a death. The deceased person didn’t choose to leave like the person in a break up did. I have been trying to find an online support group. Does anyone know of one or have any advice?

 

 

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All I can say is divorce is a million times worse than death. In the death there is some kind of closure but in divorce they go on and in my case I’m stuck and he is free to go and find another partner and a new love and I am trying to find a way to stay afloat and only have my two dogs to turn to. I am a child of a nasty horrible divorce and I never thought in a billion years that my life would have one. It’s mind boggling how it has happened and everyday every second I just ask over and over why and how?

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When I went for my annual exam a couple of months after my ex left, my doctor said it would have been better if he'd died. I appreciated that she said that, even though I didn't feel that way.  Doctor said that if I ended up on life support, he could take me off, as long as we were married. I still think it would be harder to be widowed, although there is definitely a "death" aspect. My first divorce wasn't easy -- But first ex wanted a child and I didn't, so we had a good reason to split up. Second ex left out of the blue. It's been much harder.  Even though I'm still piecing my life back together, I'm so glad to be free of marriage and wouldn't want it again.  I don't know of online support groups, though I like Vikki Stark's work (even if you weren't abandoned, per se, it might be helpful). Also I'd like to find a way to be in a relationship again, and I have no idea how to go about that. It's been two and a half years since he left, and 13 months since the divorce. I have friends and family that I can talk with, but i miss having a close relationship like that. 

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