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Dealing with people that show off their parents?


Sweetheart346

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Sweetheart346

Have you ever had someone show off in a way the fact that their parent is alive? I have a roommate, let’s call her Carey. We got along well until we got into a disagreement that resulted in her having to move somewhere else later this year. We still talk to each other but I notice that she can be passive aggressive at times so I do not consider her to be a friend at all. She knows my mother passed away after she asked in the very beginning when I moved in what my mother does for work & I told her she died from cancer. She then at the time said her mom had the same cancer but beat it. I live with two other roommates as well and I get along with those two the most. Ever since we got into the disagreement, i noticed that Carey would always bring up her mom in every conversation. We could be talking about food, school, the weather, and she would bring up her mom. With our history, it is starting to feel like she is trying to make slick jabs at me to make me feel bad that she can call her mom at anytime unlike me. It’s super weird to ask someone not to speak about their mother around me, so I haven’t. Plus she is the type to tell everything to everyone she knows so I don’t want people to know my business or feelings about the situation. How would you deal with this? 

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Dear Sweetheart346,

I'm sorry for your loss. It is hard to cope with others when we are grieving the loss of our beloved parents. Everything is a trigger and hurts so bad. I wish your roommate was more sensitive to your feelings but maybe she just doesn't know or understand how hard it can be.

If possible, try to distance yourself and try to ignore her.  I don't know if your other roommates could help you talk to her or if they think it will make a difference. Sometimes even when we tell someone they have hurt us with their words, they can be defensive and even act like we are the problems.  I know it won't be easy.

Please know we are with you.

 

 

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