It’s my fault- my baby Chuy is gone.

[Amber-Chuys Momma]

My little mini yorki Chuy was my shadow for 6 years. My constant companion and true soul mate. He was with me through the darkest of days and the recent sweet days. I recently got married and my husband has 2 large dogs- 1 male Malmute 1 female Wnglish Mastiff. They all along well, despite Chuy & the male Malamute getting to jealous tiffs. With this recent marriage came a move to a home. Due to Chuy “spritzing” on everything I chose to let him live in the large air conditioned walk-in dog house outside so he could roam free in the backyard with the other 2. He also had his own little play pen that housed his food/water and his kennel or his own little “house”. He loved his house. Wednesday morning I went out to check on him and I found him unresponsive beside his playpen, inside the large dog house. The large Malamute was lying next to him. I rushed him to the vet and they said he had Blunt Force Trauma to the head. I have no proof, but I’m 100% certain the Malamute did this. He was in an oxygen incubator for a day and a half, basically on life support and brain dead. I would go in every couple of hours & just hold him, kiss his little face & tell him I loved him & how sorry I was. Finally, on Friday afternoon as my mother & I sat and I held him, he took his last breath in my arms. I see his face in my sleep, I wake up hearing him cry outside. I’m absolutely heartbroken that this happened & it was my fault. Why did I let him stay outside? What was he thinking as it happened? Was he in pain as he laid there and his little brain was swelling? Did he cry out for me & I couldn’t hear him? All of these thoughts are tearing me apart! I’m scared I will hate my husbands dog forever. I just need to know that my baby is now ok & not alone & that he knows just how sorry I am that I didn’t protect him like I should have.... my sweet baby boy I love you with everything I am until I too take my last breath.

[Beatriz]

Hello Amber and I am very sorry about your loss. Chuy is so precious. I can relate to your pain of losing a soulmate and life companion, it is the hardest parting. We desperately wish we could go back in time and do so something, anything to prevent this outcome, but we cannot bring back this life we so much cheerished, which was a part of ours, of who we are. But then this was not your fault and death is ultimately out of our control. I do not believe Chuy is alone, can’t think of anyone who wouldn’t seek such an adorable company ever and wherever. He knows of your love and suffers no more. 

[KayC]

OMG, I am so sorry!  It is possible that the other dog did it accidentally, there is a huge difference in their sizes.  I'm sorry for the pain and trauma poor little Chuy went through and that he is out of the suffering now and at peace. I believe that death of the physical body is a transition to what is next and we will be with them again.  Also, as Beatriz said, they are not alone meanwhile.  

I have a Siberian Husky/Golden Retriever.  He doesn't have a mean bone in his body, he is totally non-aggressive, has never bitten anyone,not even when he's been attacked...and he's been attacked ten times...eight of those times by my son's Siberian Husky.  I will no longer allow them together so it means when we visit each other, we get a dog sitter.  He was also attacked by a neighbor's hound who jumped their fence, and by a neighbor's German Shepherd who burst through their gate.  I have had to separate my son's dog from what took place or I would not be able to love him, it's hard to describe, but I can't think about what he did to Arlie when I am visiting him.  Arlie is fortunate he has scars instead of an eye out because he came very very close.  Their behavior is not malicious as people attribute, we must remember they are animals, their behavior is different from ours.  Also, I have to constantly remind Arlie to look out for Kitty, my 23 year old cat, because she is about 7 lbs and could not take it if he stepped on her and he is sometimes a big oaf, unthinking.  But he's not malicious and would never hurt her on purpose, so it's very possible your husband's dog is the same.  If you ever get another little dog, make sure he has a small doghouse he can go to safely that a larger dog cannot fit into, one with enough depth to it that he can get in the back of it where they can't reach.  Or perhaps an enclosure that separates them.  I have a fence for Arlie in the front yard but Kitty doesn't go in it, she stays to the back yard, but they are in the house together.  Now that she's lost some of her hearing and eyesight, we have to look out for her and that's a challenge.

I hope you will read these articles and take to heart what it says.  Guilt is a part of our grief, but that doesn't mean we earned it or that it's factual, it's our feelings, and our feelings aren't always rationally based.  Also, sometimes we think of all of the what ifs in a way to find a different outcome and so we think and think about what if we'd done this or that different, that's just natural, but that doesn't mean it necessarily would have had a different outcome than what happened...the truth is, we can't control everything that happens perfectly, much as we'd like to. 

http://media.wix.com/ugd/0dd4a5_e934e7f92d104d31bcb334d6c6d63974.pdf

http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml

 

[AJWCat]

I am so sorry for your terrible sudden loss. I know the shock you are in and hope you are doing okay. I echo the comments left by the others too.