Losing my cat

[Lilylouise]

Last October we got a tiny tabby kitten Charlie. I’ve never been overly fussed with animals but I definitely bonded with charlie. He would sleep in my room with me most nights. My brother and his girlfriend had a baby and have been living back home for a few weeks for the extra hand so we have had a real busy house. Charlie the cat, fetty the dog , 6 adults and 3 children.  Oh and not forgetting our new kitten Alice. It’s saturday, 2 days had passed and we noticed we hadn’t seen Charlie since Thursday .. he hadn’t been neutered so presumed the only explanation for his disappearance could be he had gone to find a mate. (Knowing that he had been chipped, we knew we would get a call if anything did happen to him) we spent the whole weekend looking for him desperate to find him, he still seemed way too young to be away from home for so long.

the following Wednesday Mum took Alice to be chipped at our local vet. As Mum went to the vet reception after the chipping the receptionist said “right now you have to go online and register her” Mum was surprised and explained that last year we had Charlie chipped here and was not told we had to register him!! He had been missing and we thought we would get a call!! 

The receptionist looked up charlie on their system and next to his name read ‘deceased’. 

We were heart broken. We knew nothing just that he was dead. 

We arrived home and frantically rang around all local rspca to find out what happened to our beautiful cat. At this time it was 8pm so information was very limited - Just that he was run over, taken to rspca Putney and a voicemail was left with us.

A VOICE MAIL ???? 

It was true .. we had a voice mail from almost a week previous explaining that they had our charlie he had been run over and had a broken jaw and all this time we had no idea it was there waiting for us to hear. 

8am following morning offices opened and the vet who had been caring for charlie was able to  explain to us how it all happened.

 

he had been run over on Thursday (before we had even suspected him missing ). Someone saw it happen and took charlie to the rspca. They put him straight in for surgery. Charlie died on the Sunday while in recovery. Everyone of those days he was with them we had been out looking for him and even then after with no idea what was really happening. 

If only we had seen the voicemail. We would have been there to support and love him through his operation and maybe he would have pulled through. 

Mum keeps thinking it was Thursday that she saw him meowing outside the house as she rushed off for work. She thinks if only she went back and let him in before rushing off.

We hold particular bad feelings towards the vets. They didn’t explain about registering him back when he was chipped last year, even the leaflet they gave said nothing about online registration. As he wasn’t registered the rspca had to phone the chipping company ,who were able to tell them his local vets ,who then were able to pass on our phone number. Why did the vets only give a house number? Why didn’t they give a mobile? And when we brought Alice in for chipping they had already spoken to the rspca at this point and failed to mention until we enquired about charlie.

we’re all riddled with guilt and feeling so heart broken.

 

We feel like failures. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Beatriz]

I am so sorry for your loss. Charlie is adorable and looks so much like my Tripps when he was a baby. My heart goes out to you in your sorrow and distress over the circumstances of Charlie’s death and the way you found out about it. It is hard because one way or another we are left with a number of questions and have to learn to live with them. Sometimes and even when we find answers, those are not convincing enough and fail to comfort us. 

 

 

 

[AJWCat]

Oh no I am so sorry for your loss and terrible sequence of events. Nice of a stranger who tried to help him.  Poor sweet kitty. My heart breaks for you all. 

 

[KayC]

I'm sorry for your loss.  Charlie looks like a very sweet kitty. I'm sorry you weren't made to understand how the chipping works and that you didn't check your answering machine.  Guilt is a common grief response, all of the what ifs is kind of our way of looking for a different outcome, but even if all of the what ifs were so, it could have still held the same outcome.  I hope you will read these articles and that they help you find peace.

http://media.wix.com/ugd/0dd4a5_e934e7f92d104d31bcb334d6c6d63974.pdf

http://www.pet-loss.net/guilt.shtml