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Love hurts

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Love hurts

Before i knew it I have fallen in love with a woman that was having an affair with a married man that committed suicide over a year ago.   I have expressed my love for her in so many ways.  Although we spend quality time together she had her former dead lover on her mind.  She says she cannot commit to me because she is still committed to him.  She told me recently that she isn't sure if she wants to heal.  I have told her that I do not want her to forget him nor to stop loving him and that I am here for her.  I just want her to heal.  I don't know what to do.  My friends tell me to back off yet part of me thinks if I do she will back off too.  When we are together she is so happy and I can tell she cares.  But when we are apart she tends to distance herself.  We live 8 hours from each other but have been seeing each other routinely every couple of weeks.  She had slowly told me about him. She does not talk much.   I am encouraging but I just don't know how to proceed.  Do I back off or do I keep telling her every day that I love her? 

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