Members TheHurt Posted June 11, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 11, 2018 Losing Jacob has been the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with my whole life to the point I don't know what do with myself anymore... Days seem to go by in a blur and all because of someone elses carelessness... On May 19th it was just another Saturday morning my 8 year old little girl got up because my little man 2 years old was up and full of life and ready to start the day. I got up and set the up in the living room watching TV so that I could finish packing up my bedroom. We were in the middle of a move because my husband and I were in the middle of a divorce and I couldn't afford the place I was living because he refused to pay child support and help me with the children. (But that's nor here are there). They were both in the living room playing as they normally do and my friend who was staying with due to an abusive situation was asleep in my room. I was helping her out because that's what I do help people because I know what it's like to be in an abusive situation myself basically why I'm in the middle of a divorce. My son and daughter come in the room a few times that morning to show me pictures that they draw and ask me for breakfast and snacks like they normally do. Nothing our of the normal. Then my little boy comes in room and asks me for a banana again nothing out of the normal. I come out of the room and walk to the kitchen holding my little boys hand and see nothing out of the norm. Cut up the banana and give him the plate and he walks over toward the wall to sit and eat it and then I tell him lets go over toward the TV to eat you banana baby. I pick him up and that's when I notice he's shaking as if he's cold and I ask him what's wrong. At this point I know SOMETHING IS WRONG. I LOOK AROUND THE ROOM AND NOTICE MY FRIENDS PILLS BOTTLE ON THE FLOOR EMPTY! My son at that point goes into a seizure. I yell for my friend to call 911. The ambulance arrives in maybe 2 minutes. I run down starts with my baby in arms in a panic to EMS. The ride to the hospital seemed like forever but his heart stopped in the ambulance on the way to the hospital and they were unable to revive him at that point at 9:15AM that morning. At 9:30AM I asked them when were at the hospital if they were able to bring him back they said no... I DROPPED TO MY KNEES SCREAMING.... They called his time of death May 19, 2018 at 10:15AM My sweet Jacob was gone I held him for 20 minutes in the hospital room replaying everything in mind. HATING MYSELF! WANTING TO DIE IN THAT MOMENT. I'm in so much pain and hurting knowing I should have been paying more attention... Why didn't I hear him? Why wasn't the CHILD PROOF bottle closed all the way? The medication that he gained access to; was in my friends purse... so he went through her purse and got the bottle and probably thought it was candy... It was sleeping pills... Me as a parent my medication is WAY up high so my kids can't gain access to it... Because that's what parents do... but I still blame myself for my child dying... why God? Why take my sweet boy? Help me understand? I just have no words...... I just don't understand... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Tommy's mum Posted June 11, 2018 Members Report Share Posted June 11, 2018 thehurt I am so sorry for the loss of your precious little boy. It was not your fault, as a mom you always ensured a safe environment for your family and kept medications out of reach. Your friend did not think anyone would go through her purse and she also must be absolutely distraught at the tragic loss of your son. You sound like a really caring kind person to offer a friend shelter and a safe place to be and it is awful for this accident to happen. We all meet on the thread Loss of an adult child by Mom of Justin it is at the top of the page with the most views and posts. It keeps us all in one place and able to support each other and is open to anyone who has lost a child of any age in any way. you are welcome to join us and perhaps we can offer you support and understanding.I lost my eldest son in 2015 aged 24 years in an accident and i am still on the learning curve of grief and its impact. The members have been so helpful and they get it when others do not because they have not walked in our shoes. Take care Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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