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peggy a sad mom

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peggy a sad mom

hi my 44 year old son passed away on jan 20 2018. today is two weeks since his wake. i hurt so much i don't know where the tears are coming from i just can't stop. as i put it drop me from a plane it won't hurt this much. he lived with me most of his life so there is no spot in my life without memories. i hear from people i will never get better and others say give it time. i've read you learn to cope with it but i just can't imagine. i scream all day for someone to please help me but it doesn't work and guess it never will. i can write all day on here about how about i miss him and don't want to live without him but from what i'm reading everyone survives. i'm just asking to please tell me if this broken heart will get better or kill me

thanks

peggy

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Hi Peggy,

I am so very sorry for your loss and your pain. I myself am not a mother, but I did just lose my 41 year old Brother to stage 4 lung cancer just over 2 years ago and I will tell you myself and my Mother are completely broken. My Mother never thought she would be able to go on just as  you do right now. But something happens that just gives us the inner strength to carry on. I know this is completely new to you seeing that your Son just recently passed, but I do know that he would want you to be ok. It is so hard to think that way, especially when it is so fresh. I still constantly struggle with the loss of my Brother, but it is a little less painful than it was in the beginning. Good and bad days of emotions. Please hang in there, try to seek some therapy perhaps or be with loved ones as much as possible. Maybe yourself and my Mother can talk.

 

Take care,
Dori

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Hi Peggy...I Just lost my 21 year old December 21st 2017. Was terribly devastating and I'm still trying to get through each day. 

Anytime you would like to chat I'm here.

I just know everything we feel is normal and all have felt it.

My days are g3tting better. Less crying and able to remember the good times. I couldn't at first.

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peggy a sad mom

Hi thanks for writing. My son Ron passed away jan 20th I haven't started to remember the good things yet but I am happy to know they are coming. Thanks again

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Peggy:   Somehow, I will find a post that I must have 'missed '.... your post hit me... your dear, Ron, 44 year old son died 3 days before my Jason died on January 23rd.  I did not cry a single tear until yesterday when we received the death certificate.  Everyone kept telling me...." you are really holding up well; you are so strong....yadayadayada".  I couldn't cry.  Jason's twin , Meredith, couldn't stop crying.  She was absolutely wailing, non-stop, so I think I was afraid for her to see me cry or something; heck, I don't know.  Even now, she cries every time I talk to her on the phone.  She told me today that the only way she is making it thru work everyday is to call me on her lunch break so she can cry, sitting in the car.  She has had the most difficult question of anyone....."'Mama, am I still a twin?"  She lives in Alabama... we are in Texas .. exactly 770 miles apart.  And then, I would not allow my 2 grandson's , Jeremy's ( younger brother)- Carson-  11, and Ryder- is 3 tomorrow... see GRAND-MAma cry.  There is only one thing that I do know at this point...I am obsessed thinking about Jason.  Totally obsessed. Surely this will get better, because right now, I know I am going insane.

Peggy-  you and I are really connected by the dates.  XXOO margarett 

 

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peggy a sad mom

Margarett yes we are January 20 th. We are in New York. Yes my Ron was 44 I cry I scream and yell. I am so scared I'm not going to survive this cause you feel like you can't Ron was my only child and I don't have grandchildren. I sit in my car at lunch time to and cry my eyes. I didn't know it was humanly possible to hurt so bad. Please let me know how you are doing day to day

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