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justshade

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My husband died in his sleep, at the age of 46, just a few days ago. His parents were extremely supportive the first couple of days, but now? I NEED them to stop sending me emails and texts telling me all the things David did wrong growing up, and even in adulthood. Also to stop telling me how my husband's inheritance will now go to his sister, and nothing to me, his wife of 16 years. How do I gently tell them that I don't want to hear about things Dave did when he was 15, and I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE INHERITANCE? I don't want to tell them off, after all: they are grieving too, but I can't take much more of this. I have NO ONE here. Dave was my only family. I'm trying to be nice to his parents but ... when will it stop? How can I get them to stop?? How do I deal with this? I hope someone is around tonight that may be able to comment.

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Dear justshade,

I'm very sorry for your loss. I know the pain and sorrow is deep. I'm so sorry David's parents are bombarding you with texts and emails that are upsetting. Instead of saying anything during this raw and emotional time, I wonder if you will consider just blocking them. Put their phone number and email address on a blocked list. I fear if you confront them they will take it the wrong way during their grief as well.

Or consider opening switching phone numbers or email addresses just to get away from their messages.

Thinking of you. Sorry to hear what you are going through.  I hope others can add more insight.

The forum also has a Loss of Partner thread that might be able to answer this question as well.

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Honestly if they do not respect you as family, heck even as a person, just block them like the previous user suggested. My husband passed away recently and I never got close to his family, but I had their grandson and I feel like they are trying to do their best to relate to me and so am I, but if there wasn’t a grandchild in the middle they would probably do the same to me that your in-laws are doing. AND AFTER SOME TIME, AT SOME POINT I WOULD BLOCK THEM.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Grieving.com

 

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