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RC94

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Hi

Ive just joined the forum this evening.

Im 22 years old and you may find me extremely lucky to be of this age and only just at the beginning of March did I experience my first ever death of someone so close and precious to me. I lost my grandmother. She had lived with us for over 10 years. 

I feel so lost inside. I can't talk to my mum because she herself is too upset and I don't want to make her anymore upset. I've tried talking to my sister, but she is having issues in her life too. She has recently gone through a divorce and has 2 children to think about. I end up crying at work at the most stupid of things or at the most stupid times. I just can't help it. I miss my Nan so much I'm totally heartbroken. Sometimes I cry myself to sleep. And you know what else, every night at around 8pm I cry for around 20 minutes, on my own away from everybody.  I hear my nans voice and I can smell her too. 

No one knows how I feel. I can't even tell my best friend. She is on the other side of the world doing her dream job in America.

I just feel so lost and alone.

 

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Dear RC94,

I'm very sorry to hear about your Nan. Its only natural and normal to cry and feel as you do. Grief is horrible and a terrible shock to the mind and body.

During these difficult times, don't be afraid to reach out. Continue to surround yourself with loving friends and family. Consider grief counselling or joining a support group.

Please know you are not alone. We are all here to listen and support you.

Thinking of you. Sending you love and hugs.

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I am so sorry to hear about your Nan.  I lost my Gram back in January.  I was very close to her, much like you were to your Nan.  I encourage you to talk with your family about your grief.  They may be going through some other life things but sharing memories may help you all.  Reach out to someone, you are not alone.

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Hey,

I know what you are feeling. I loss my grandpa 12/16/16. It was a sudden loss and we all lived in the same house. My grandpa, grandma, mom, my aunt, and me. My grandpa was a father figure to me. My grandma doesn't have the will to live anymore and it hurts me when she says she doesnt want to live anymore and that she will never be happy. It's like we don't matter to her. But I understand what she's feeling. As im also BROKEN. I just finished my masters this may and now i'm struggling to find my passion and is now job hunting. But im also broken personally hecause of what happened. I DONT KNOW HOW TO HELP MY GRANDMA ANYMORE. i dont know how to save someone who cannot be saved? Most importantly, I don't know how I can save myself? 

 

I am writing to you today because I am the same age as you. i'm 22! So i want you to know that, as cliche as it sounds, you are not alone! Although sometimes it feels like it, you are not. Everyone is facing and battling his or her own demons and I want you to know that it is okay. That the only thing you could really do is to keep moving forward. To try, even though it's really hard, to see the beauty in life. Maybe through your friends, or nature, or strangers. Life sucks my friend, we both know that, but what we can only do is to keep moving forward. 

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These days, I try to deal with grief by distracting myself such as working out, playing the guitar, hanging out with friends, walking at the beach, staring at the beauty of nature, cooking my favorite food, eating that chocolate bar, or focusing on myself and asking myself what makes me happy. I guess what I am trying to say is, it is okay to focus on fixing yourself first before you try to help other people. 

Please if you need anyone to talk to, don't be afraid to reach out to me or to the people that are surrounding you. 

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Muzikluvr91

I feel for you; i lost my grandpa in nov of 2011 at only 19 and he was the first person i'd ever lost. I was very close with my grandparents so it was extremely hard :( sending you big hugs and lots of love 

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