I'm not sure if "passive" is the appropriate word for my behavior so feel free to suggest a better word if there is one.  I am at the 9 month mark since my husband's unexpected death and sometime around 6 months, I stopped crying completely. I stopped because I gave up. I admitted defeat. Life won. The powers that be have won. I have nothing left in me. I merely exist. I get up early, feed the dogs, take them out, shower, fill my day with pointless ****, eat dinner, watch TV, go to bed. Rep