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bassoon

My father I never got the chance to meet committed suicide

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bassoon

I have never posted on a site like this before but I am really struggling and looking for some help or advice. 

My biological father, who I never got the chance to meet, died by suicide over the summer. I found out about his passing only two weeks after it happened through a google search of his name since I wanted to try to find a picture of him to show my significant other. 

I always assumed I would be able to meet him and share my life with him someday, but the choice is no longer mine. He made the decision for me when he took his own life and I am very sad and angry about it. I don't know how I am supposed to grieve for someone I never got the chance to meet, much less how I am supposed to grieve for someone I never got the chance to meet who committed suicide. I feel as if I am grieving for him as a person as well as grieving for the relationship we never got to have and now never will. 

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Jup

Hi bassoon, I'm so very sorry for what you're going through.

I won't begin to try to say that I understand how you're feeling, if there's one thing I've learned recently, it is that people tell you that they can understand, and TBH they don't... They just don't.

What I can say is that I know how it feels to be both angry and so very sad that someone has made the decision to deprive us of the chance to share their lives. I am told that this is normal and not to fight it, but to accept it as part of the grieving process.

My heart goes out to you and yours.

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