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Taking a Break From Grief Work, Talked With a Medium


Jeff In Denver

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Jeff In Denver

I hope you all are doing as well as you can under these circumstances.

I have been staying off the grief sites, doing research, etc.  Just giving it a short rest.  Does anyone else do that?  Sometimes it gets a little tedious for me.

Earlier this week I talked with a medium via phone.  Somehow she came up with the first letter of my girlfriend's name, Mila.   She said that Mila pushed her way past everyone else to reach me.   She said some things that didn't make sense at all.  But she also said that we liked watching old TV shows, "like 'Frasier'."  Wow!  What are the odds???  That show is the one we used to watch for a while late at night on Netflix!  (As a side note we both loved "Arrested Development," too.  That's probably the best comedy of all time).

She also mentioned that my girlfriend had touched my right shoulder a few times, I remember that(!), but I had shrugged it off.  But she also said that intense grief can make the person on the other side back off.  That's disappointing, as that's when we need them most.  I really hope my girlfriend does it again when she's ready.

It gave me some hope, but I am concerned about what she got wrong and also, as is typical, want more and more signs of communication.

I found an interesting site with an afterlife forum:  http://afterlifeforums.com/     One of the people there suggested that my girlfriend had guided me there, to help.  You might want to check it out.

 

 

 

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Hi Jeff,---Those of us that believe in the afterlife need those signs of communication as our safety net and evidence that we are still loved and not forgotten. I've read that our souls choose our next life here. All the events and the people who come into our life and leave or stay. Our souls need the life experience for soul growth. It's a lot of research and even harder to comprehend.

Have you read Journey of Souls by Michael Newton? I just ordered it. I miss my husband desperately and getting through the days has been a struggle. I'm searching for answers for why I'm still here. Why would my soul pick this life experience of finding the love of my life, having 25 years with him that went by very quickly and the suffering I'm going through now? I had a past lives reading. My husband and I are soul mates and have been husband and wife in previous lives where we both had to suffer the loss of each other. We survived and were reunited in the afterlife. The reader told me that I'll survive this again but right now, all I want to do is be with my husband. I'm 57 and the reader told me I have a long life here yet. I'm in unbearable heartache and feeling so lost that I can't comprehend being here for very long.

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I felt that touch last night, it was real, there is no explaining it away, the dog and cat were not near, no one else is here.  This is the second time it has happened to me in my eleven years  he's been gone (earlier this year was the first time), maybe I was not open to it before so did not notice, who knows, all I know is I appreciate his efforts.

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As someone who has always had strong beliefs in the afterlife and sometimes paranormal experiences, I believe it is good to keep open to feelings a loved one may give after they have passed on. One common thing is that random/unexplainable pennies sometimes are known as a sign from a loved one. I myself have experienced that as well as feelings of being hugged or touched. 

If you would ever have specific paranormal or unexplainable phenomenon questions, I would enjoy working through them with you seeing as this has been a passion of mine for quite some time now.

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Jeff In Denver

Thank you MLG23, I really appreciate that.  That's very kind of you!  Keeping open it a good idea.

I am doing a session with a different medium tomorrow at 5:00 MST.  I'll let you know how it goes.

 

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Hi Jeff--Good to hear you are going to talk to a different medium since you sounded skeptical about your first talk with one. Hopefully, this next one is the real deal for you.

I talked to a couple different ones also. My husband is definitely around spiritually, which gives me a little comfort. I'm still in the hard place of adjusting to the loss of him physically. My pets know he is here. They are calm and and taking this tragedy a lot better than I am. Animals are close to the spirit world. They can tune in whereas we can't. We need the training for that ability. I'm hoping in time that I can make a better connection to my husband. Intense grief undermines having an open mind and heart.

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Jeff In Denver

Well, I tried the other medium tonight.  I guess she is on the radio here and is well-known.  I booked 1/2 hour but we talked for an hour and 10 minutes.  She wound up not charging me!  She is a very nice lady and is obviously of good character.

It was an awkward session.  The first 20 minutes was her telling me things about my girlfriend that made no sense.  I wondered if we were even talking about the same person!  There was all this talk about archangels, chakras, the burgundy room, alchemy, and a lot of stuff that made no sense to me.  Frustratingly, I had so many questions, but wasn't able to ask them because she was always talking.  She kept asking for my permission for the spirits to release my whatever (I can't recall the terms) to allow my girlfriend and I to communicate.  I felt like saying:  "You have my permission for everything!" I also got the old "she want you to move on" nonsense, which upset me.

She said that my GF didn't hear me when I talk to her most of the time, which was very frustrating, as I do that a lot.

But toward the end she said that she felt extreme love on both sides.

As with the previous medium, she said that my GF kept touching my right shoulder but that I didn't notice.  Not much of a stretch to say that...

It's good that she recorded the session and will e-mail it to me.

 

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While I feel good that she didn't charge you, it sounds upsetting that it didn't sound like you were talking about the same person!  YOU would know her more than anyone!

The one thing she did get right is there's extreme love on both sides.  I'm a firm believer that love doesn't end with the grave.

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Jeff In Denver

It left me feeling very unsettled. 

The first medium had said that my girlfriend, Mila, had pushed her way through to the front of the line to talk with me.  This time it was a guy, who I didn't know.  I did lose a male friend 15 years ago or so, but the medium asked if it was my father, a brother, etc.  Her description didn't match this guy.

She said that I had lost Mila suddenly.  Well, I guess if you consider over two years "suddenly!"

She said that I hadn't been eating well, and that Mila was worried about my nutrition.  Um, I am a vegetarian and health nut.  I have never been better about it.

She said to look for signs like the number 3, quarters where they wouldn't normally be, and black bird feathers.  You can read that anywhere.

Anyway, I know that they are not always available to communicate, but I wish she had told me that.  The whole session just felt kinda fake.  But it's odd that she more than doubled the time and didn't charge me...

 

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The no charging part is quite confusing, but it sounds like they were probably not communicating with your girlfriend. I have found that it can also depend on the medium's energy. If your girlfriend has a comfort level with others that was not reached by the medium, she may not have felt comfortable coming forward. Also in regards to spiritual energy, it takes a lot to come through for a loved one who has passed. It could be that she needed recovery time to build up enough energy to get strong messages through. Thanks for sharing the experience!

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Maybe the medium knew she wasn't connecting with her and wouldn't have felt right charging you.

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Jeff In Denver

I think you are both right.  I wish the medium had said:  "Dude, I'm really sorry but I am not making any kind of connection right now.  This happens.  Maybe we can try again soon."  

I would have preferred that.

I am going to try KMB's recommended medium tomorrow night.  I will report back.

 

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Hi Jeff. Thank you. I found this post you were referring to. I am definitely open to this kind of thing. 

I believe that some people have the ability to be a medium. This is a special gift and it is amazing. Unfortunately, others do not have this gift but pretend it and thus give false readings to people. This is very wrong. They take advantage of people wanting to make contact with their loved ones. Just be careful. In saying that, if you find a really good one this could prove to be comforting for you. 

I am thinking of visiting one in the future. I feel I need to be strong enough first. Take care and let us know how you go. 

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Jeff In Denver

Thanks, Monty.  I agree.  It takes a special kind of evil person who would do false readings, profiting unjustly from people's grief.

Well, I tried the new medium tonight.  She is located in Joplin, MO, so we used Skype.  It was basically a non-connection.  She said that this happens sometimes, and that frequently she gets information after the session and passes it along.  I found that I had to ask a lot of questions and try to move the reading forward - it was awkward.

The medium stuck me as being a very nice person who wasn't doing this for the money.  She offered a refund, but I didn't take her up on it.

How nice it would be if the medium isn't able to connect to just be direct about it.  So far I haven't seen that.

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Hi Jeff. I recommend the medium Fara Gibson from Arizona. I had a Skype reading with her, she knew absolutely nothing about me. I even gave false name etc. 

She got everything right, in so much detail. She was even able to tell me things I didn't know, which were confirmed as accurate later. She's undoubtedly the real deal.

It really helped me. 

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Soryashusband

My wife died in June and I have been coming to this site often since then. I want to thank you Jeff because it was you who led me to the Foreverfamily Foundation and then to trying a medium. I had my session on Wednesday and it brought me a clarity I haven't known since my wife died. This is the closest to peace I have felt since my wife died. I never would have tried it if it wasn't for you. I can't thank you enough.

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Soryashusband,

Welcome to this site, I'm glad you were able to find some comfort.  I hope you will continue to come back.

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Soryashusband

Thank you very much.  On one hand it's so good to find others who understand what I'm going through. On the other, I wish no one else had to go through this pain.

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velvettuberose
On 11/18/2016 at 1:56 AM, Nik B said:

Hi Jeff. I recommend the medium Fara Gibson from Arizona. I had a Skype reading with her, she knew absolutely nothing about me. I even gave false name etc. 

She got everything right, in so much detail. She was even able to tell me things I didn't know, which were confirmed as accurate later. She's undoubtedly the real deal.

It really helped me. 

Nik B, I communicated to my husband through Fara and she was very accurate about a lot of things that only my husband and I knew. I will do it again in January for the 1 year anniversary of Walter's passing. Amazing connection; Walter came through immediately. 

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Jeff In Denver

I talked with the fourth medium tonight.  She wasn't getting anywhere, refunded the session, and ended the call.  She was very nice and honest.  But, wow, do I feel discouraged.  I have never receive any signs, and I don't know if I have to use medium after medium to even have any hope of getting even a shred of communication with my girlfriend.

It's bad enough to have lost her.  I wish it didn't have to be so damn hard to communicate with her.

 

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Hi Jeff, I'm sorry you aren't having luck with mediums. It's a process of research and testimonials from actual clients. From all my reading, spirit can communicate immediately upon leaving their physical body.  The above posts from NikB and velvettuberose have talked with Fara Gibson, the medium from Arizona. They were successful readings. I have been in contact with Fara myself just to ask questions about the afterlife. She never has an issue with communication. Spirit wants to communicate with us just earnestly as we do. I haven't had a reading from Fara myself yet. Her fee is not within my financial means at this time. I wish you luck and prayers in finding a reputable medium. Have you asked Mila to leave you a specific sign? A couple days ago, I went to town and I left a note for my husband just like I did when he was here. I asked him to move the note while I was gone. Upon my return, the note was in the same place. I asked my husband if he had read the note and the kitchen light blinked. That sign kept me calm the rest of the evening.

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Jeff In Denver

KMB,  thanks for writing.  I checked Fara's site, and she charges $250 per hour.  I hear she's good.  I have the money, but I won't spend it on high-priced mediums just on principle.  I will continue my search.  I have heard that price doesn't necessarily equal ability, and that's good news.  It really gets me that some of these people charge such high amounts, basically profiting from pain.  

It helps to know that they want to communicate with us just as much.  I needed to hear that.

I haven't asked for a specific sign.  What a great idea!  I will do that tonight.  That is really impressive about your husband.  I hope you do that again again soon.

I hope you're doing as okay as you can in these circumstances.  Thank you again.

 

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It must feel frustrating.  I haven't been to a medium (religious reasons) but have learned to hope through my faith, I believe with all my heart that they continue to live on, just in different form.  There's a lot we don't know, but a lot we do know about it, there's been so many studies about afterlife.  I do know one thing, our love continues.

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Hi Jeff, yes Fara is expensive - I don't live in the U.S so the foreign currency exchange means her fee is double for me. But trust me, once you have a reading with her, you will consider it cheap. She's so good! I couldn't imagine how I would be feeling now if I didn't connect with my partner through Fara. I recorded the reading and I listen to it almost every day, it's the best $250 I've ever spent. I wish I could afford it more often :(

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I've never thought about visiting a medium, guess I'm not a true believer.  If that comforts you, by all means I believe you should do it.  For me, it's faith in God  - HE touched my heart giving his assurance that my husband is OK  - that's food for my soul.   Psalm 91:4  reads, "He will cover you with his feathers and under his wings you will find refuge".

I still ache for my husband and sometimes I literally break down to my core.   I constantly ask for God's strength and love to get me through this.  And he does -   He never said this life would be easy, but he did promised that when it wasn't, he would be there loving us each and every step of the way.  Know that he is - God loves us and doesn't want us to hurt.  

I am so thankful for the many years we had together and that our love is forever.  While I still miss him like crazy, I know he's OK and someday, we will be together - together for all eternity.  Talk about a 'kodak' moment - much more than that - an "AMAZING" moment.  God Bless   

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Francine, It seems to me that everyone who has lost a loved one wants to know if they are ok. Of course they are, they are in Heaven! Heaven is a beautiful place filled with love and peace. No more physical suffering of the body and the strife and trials that are experienced here on earth. God is giving us this life on earth for the experiences and lessons we must learn before eternal life.My husband obviously finished his life work and lessons before me. I am lost without his physical presence. I miss my husband every second but I know in my heart he is ok. I am the one who is not ok. I feel that a huge part of the grieving is for us.I was left behind because God's plan was not for my husband and I to go to Heaven together. Some people are fortunate that way, to go together or shortly after one another, but I am still here grieving for my loss .Maybe this is my lesson to be learned, how to survive an unbearable loss.

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Hi Jeff. I never, ever considered a medium in the past. I was deathly opposed to them because of the warnings in the Bible. But I lost my husband two months ago and immediately following his death, I was so broken and desperate I think I would have done anything to talk to him. I did some research and found a medium here in my town who had some good recommendations. I was able to get in to see her right away but only because she had one cancellation. (Her calendar was posted online.) She did offer information to me that there is no way she could have known. She brought messages from both my parents and my husband. In spite of that, I still have a hard time completely believing and letting down my guard but I am trying to be open-minded and I will go to another reading eventually. Just not soon. She did tell me that the stronger the grief, the harder it is for a spirit to communicate to us. And some spirits are more able to communicate than others. I hope you find some comfort soon.

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Hi JC and all,

I no longer classify myself as a Christian, but I was certainly aware of scriptural pronouncements against mediums. I'm so glad you decided to have an open mind, and that you had a positive experience. 

After my husband died, the question it seems most of us want the answer to - "Is he/she okay?" burned so furiously in me that I decided try speaking with a medium. I'll share my experience in case it's worth anybody's while to read :)

With my skeptic self going crazy, I decided to have a reading with a UK-based psychic who does a weekly column in an Aussie magazine; I've followed that column for about 5 years, and based on the evidentiary stuff she seems to give people, I did not and do not think she's a charlatan bilking the grieving out of their cash -- though I understand that there are some unscrupulous poseurs out there (they have my everlasting disgust).

I contacted her for a private reading - she was not expensive (40 British pounds for one hour worked out at $70 AUD; much cheaper than what some others charge). Now, some of what she said to me could have been said to any old grieving widow, and there were a couple of inaccuracies. But other things she said were accurate, and the kicker for me was when she said Ken would leave a white feather by my side of the bed, as a sign of his ongoing existence in my life. The next morning, no feather, and I scoffed at myself. I didn't dare mention it lest people should think I have feathers between my ears. That evening, I flipped on the bedroom light, and that feather was there, right by my side of the bed.. I am not sure what else to make of the reading - though I do think it was worth a go. All I know for sure is that Debbie told me what to look for and where  - the "where" was important because it was so specific - and that is exactly what happened.

So, do I believe feathers materialise out of nowhere? No. Do I believe they can be gifts from Spirit? Yes, I'm persuaded. I did search for rational explanations, but I think some of what we come up with can be even sillier than believing in spirit feathers. I decided to accept it as a gift from my love :) For anyone who was wondering, no, I don't have feather bedding ;)

 

myfeather.jpg

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Louise, Thank you for sharing your experience.  i am so happy and comforted that Ken came through for you. I hope you have that feather in a special place of honor.

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36 minutes ago, KMB said:

Louise, Thank you for sharing your experience.  i am so happy and comforted that Ken came through for you. I hope you have that feather in a special place of honor.

Thankyou, Sister - it's in a little bag, tucked in the pocket of this shirt of Ken's that my sister made into a cushion for me for Christmas <3

cushion.jpg

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Hi Mrs Plummer

I love your story! I have also had some undeniable signs myself. I am a big believer, I'm also a big sceptic so I don't believe unless it's undeniable. 

See even good medium's appear to get things wrong but we must understand that they aren't having a clear 2 way verbal discussion with spirit, they receive the message from spirit in a variety of ways and they have to figure out how to interpret that message and then deliver it to you. It's like Chinese whispers so unfortunately the message isn't always delivered correctly.

For example, I have seen 4 different mediums. One of them was a fraud. Another one was undeniably the real deal but I realise now that she just wasn't very experienced, she was trying to explain something to me that I didn't understand, so I thought she was just getting it wrong. 2 of the mediums I saw were so so good but they were particularly good at interpreting and delivering the messages. The last 2 told me exactly what the 2nd one tried to say, but because they interpreted and delivered the message in more detail, I was able to know exactly what it meant and I was amazed. There is no way anyone could have guessed what they told me, it's definitely a message that my partner wanted to get through to me, I just needed to find the right mediums. 

I know it sucks having to pay high fees for good mediums. But for a medium to develop the skill of interpretation and delivery, they have to do many many hours of meditation that they don't get paid for, just so they can give you the message accurately. They are still human, they have to earn money to live.

For me, I'm so happy to pay a few hundred dollars to someone who makes it possible for my partner to give me a message... The messages I got were just priceless. 

Thank you for sharing your story.

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Hey Nik, I'm glad you had a positive experience too :) I'd love to hear about some of your signs.

I agree with you, actually, that Debbie - whom I have no doubt is genuine (feather, knowing where my husband's cancer had been located, that we released balloons etc) may have misinterpreted something she got from Spirit - for example, she said that Ken knows I've been angry with him for leaving me - which I never have, not once. But I have been enraged with the cancer itself for taking him. and I did wonder if she was sensing that anger, but filtering it through her own human fallibility.

I don't have any problem with mediums charging for their services, but some will do say, one email question for $150, or charge $300  for 45 minutes. I think that's a bit greedy, and the greater expense may not always be an indicator of greater skill. But if a medium who's a bit more expensive can be safely vouched for, it might be worth those who can afford it, paying. I'm glad you found it worthwhile :)

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Louise, The cushion your sister made is beautiful and having the feather from Ken in the pocket is is like a 2 for 1 gift. Thanks for sharing. I'm sure Ken is proud of you for honoring him in that way.

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Thankyou, KMB - my sister also suffused the cushion insert with Ken's cologne - Joop Homme. It's a comfort to have. A friend of mine dresses a pillow in one of her late hubby's shirts and finds that a comfort too.

I read just recently about people who are trying to deny that a loved one's death has occurred. The article suggested that ways they do this are keeping a loved one's room intact or - on topic with this thread - seeking help from spiritualists in order to try and sustain the attachment to that loved one. I was a bit vexed that the author seems to suggest that seeking psychic readings is problematic in itself.

I don't deny that this MAY be a way to deny a death, but I don't think it necessarily always is - or certainly not in my own case. Am I denying that Ken died? No, I live with that excoriating, rotten fact every day. Is it perfectly legitimate to hold a belief system wherein our loved ones survive in spirit, and where some contact with them, perhaps facilitated by people who have certain abilities, may be possible? Holy run-on sentence, Batman, yep, absolutely. It's not my experience that seeking a medium reading has prevented me from working with my grief about Ken not being here in the physical, and deriving comfort from the knowledge that he's here in spirit does not constitute "denial".

 

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I can understand keeping a loved one's room intact. Especially with the loss of a child. It would be a place where the family could go into to feel closer and have that sense of presence. I wouldn't think that would be denial. It is a way for a family to honor their loss that their child did exist. I have also heard of wives keeping their husband's home office, den or *man cave* intact. It is where that husband spent a fair amount of his time and the essence of spirit would probably be more prominent.

It is the stories that we hear on tv or read on media that can come across as denial. The people who keep the bodies of their dead loved one. Some claim they didn't know what to do when the loved one passed ( fear, extreme shock, complete denial, the elderly). And some who might have had some form of mental illness and wasn't fully comprehending what happened.

What I do know for myself, yes, my husband is gone, no denying it. And yes, there has to to something more to believe in. There has to be more than this life on earth. There has to be a continuation of the love story in Heaven for all of us.

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I agree Mrs Plummer. I'm sure if you asked that author if they have had an experience with losing a spouse, they would say no - so their opinion is worthless to me. 

You only have to experience a loss like this to know that 'denial' isn't possible, every second of life in their absence is a reminder that they aren't here. 

I absolutely know that life exists after death, through my own experiences and through others.. In fact the only thing we leave behind is our physical body and our physical possessions... we take everything else with us to heaven/the spirit world, including our personality and our love for those we leave here. There is way too much evidence to prove this, even scientists can no longer deny it. So it exists, our partners are very much alive and we have the ability to connect with them through mediums, why wouldn't we?! I think the only people who are in denial are those who haven't yet come to realise and accept that the spirit world is a very real place and there is no harm in connecting with it... 

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28 minutes ago, KMB said:

I can understand keeping a loved one's room intact. Especially with the loss of a child. It would be a place where the family could go into to feel closer and have that sense of presence. I wouldn't think that would be denial. It is a way for a family to honor their loss that their child did exist. I have also heard of wives keeping their husband's home office, den or *man cave* intact. It is where that husband spent a fair amount of his time and the essence of spirit would probably be more prominent.

 

Agree 100% KMB - these things are not necessarily denial, but a place to go and have connection with a loved one. I ought to have clarified that. I think there's entirely too much judging how other people grieve - including by academics. They need to remember that there are important qualifiers.

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38 minutes ago, Nik B said:

I absolutely know that life exists after death, through my own experiences and through others.. In fact the only thing we leave behind is our physical body and our physical possessions... we take everything else with us to heaven/the spirit world, including our personality and our love for those we leave here. There is way too much evidence to prove this, even scientists can no longer deny it.

I can't wait until I have fully embraced that reality, Nik. I'm so looking forward to having that utter confidence... it's certainly becoming more concrete, I'm still just so full of hurt. Having said that though, affirmations that my Ken still exists - from good reading sources or from fellow grievers like yourself, is my first line of real comfort :) I'm loving the readings I've got access to that aren't silly - yes, much research is backing up the reality afterlife.

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16 minutes ago, Mrs. Plummer said:

Agree 100% KMB - these things are not necessarily denial, but a place to go and have connection with a loved one. I ought to have clarified that. I think there's entirely too much judging how other people grieve - including by academics. They need to remember that there are important qualifiers.

It is your last 2 sentences I wanted to quote ( sorry, not tech savvy). I agree there should be NO judging on how people grieve. It is a private, sacred, individual right. Some of the books out there reference stages and where you should be at a certain point. Did those authors draw on their own grieving? Maybe, maybe not. The grief support group I go to is run the same way. The meeting is once a month and the administrator reads her handouts to where she thinks we should be every month. I don't agree. She is a very empathetic person who is qualified for what she does but has never been married. She has lost relatives and friends. She doesn't quite get it how much more devastating it is to lose a husband or wife. I go to this support group because I live in an isolated country area and I know it is important for my state of mind to get away from the home and interact with others. There are 2 others in the group who have lost their spouse and I know one them, he is actually related to my husband's family somewhere down the line. It has been comforting in relating to these 2 people.

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I totally understand. It's hard enough to get through this at all, it's impossible to set bench marks to the stages we should be in our grief process. There is no normal way grieve, there are so many factors that need to be considered. For example: my partner passed away suddenly and unexpectedly and I was there, so I'm nowhere near even past the shock stage yet. 

Each of us are different, with different circumstances and so it's impossible to have a 'text book' recovery process. 

Ive lost many people, even my best friend... but I can assure you the pain of losing a friend comes nowhere near the depths of devastation over losing a spouse/soul mate/life partner... it's so different.

If we're still alive, we are doing well (in my opinion). Unless someone has been through a loss this big, there is no way they could ever understand how hard it is. 

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Nik B---

17 minutes ago, Nik B said:

If we're still alive, we are doing well (in my opinion).

I totally agree. I often wonder why my grieving hasn't ended me yet. Why did the *broken heart syndrome* pass me by? The only way around that one, is that my husband did not want to leave me but his broken down body forced him to. I like to think he is helping me along this unwanted path to see that I live the rest of my days for him.

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Mrs Plummer, I understand. It's very easy to doubt their non-physical existence because we live in a physical world and we are taught that we need physical proof for everything. But we can't see the air that we breathe, yet we know it exists because we can feel it, right?

For me, there is no interference with the bond I have with my partner, I still feel it as strongly as I did when he was here. It just feels like he's in another country, but he definitely doesn't feel 'gone', he's very much existing somewhere, I can feel it.

i think if you stop and think about it, you probably can feel that your bond with your husband is still there too? 

Dont get me wrong, I'm still very very sad that he is not here with me, but it's helpful to know that he is safe, that's the most important thing for me.

Have you read the book Imagine Heaven? It's really nice, I think you will like it. It does refer to bible scripture though (which is something I like about it) but if you're not a Christian, you could read or watch the near death experience story of Pamela Reynolds, her story defies science and proves that our spirit definitely continues to live after our physical body dies. 

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2 minutes ago, KMB said:

Nik B---

I totally agree. I often wonder why my grieving hasn't ended me yet. Why did the *broken heart syndrome* pass me by? The only way around that one, is that my husband did not want to leave me but his broken down body forced him to. I like to think he is helping me along this unwanted path to see that I live the rest of my days for him.

Yes KMB, I still can't believe the pain of this loss hasnt actually killed me. Ive seen lesser suffering end a life :(

But for some reason we are still supposed to be here and it will all make sense once we get back 'home'. I'm sure your husband will be helping you along the way... Outside of our physical bodies, time and space doesn't exist so from his perspective it won't be long till he is with you again.. the thought of that helps me a lot... 

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13 hours ago, Nik B said:

If we're still alive, we are doing well (in my opinion). Unless someone has been through a loss this big, there is no way they could ever understand how hard it is.

I so agree!!

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Jeff In Denver

JC_TX,  I am glad that you had a good experience.  We always want more evidence, I know.   And I also know that devout Christians don't like the idea of mediums, and I have always wondered if those were people who have never lost their partners.  Please let us know how it goes when you go back.

I have heard the same thing:  When we're really hurting and desperately want to communicate with our partner, that's when it's the hardest.  How ironic and frustrating.

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Friends who are interested in mediumistic stuff: I scanned the following for a grieving friend who is interested in a reading. I have followed Debbie's column for several years, and I like that she consistently gives such accurate evidentiary information. It's nice to be reminded each week why I chose her for a private reading, and to believe in her genuineness given what she said about my Kenny. Just for anybody's interest xo

debbie.jpg

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