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e4bruen

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I'm new to the forum....I don't quite know how to feel about using a forum, but after my loss a couple of people suggested I give it a try.  I lost my significant other almost 7 months ago to unknown causes....how frusterating...unknown causes.  Its the thing I have struggled with the most.  Eric was a healthy 25 year old and after his passing his father informed me he was planning on proposing....its been 7 months and I don't know when its too long to still be greiving!  I feel like it just happened yesterday and it feels like its never going to get better....such a disgusting and lonely feeling.  I thought about doing therapy but I couldn't imagine sitting in front of someone who has never lost someone special and expecting them to understand what I'm feeling...so that is what brought me here.  I want to know that I'm not the only one feeling this way...this deep sadness and lonliness; its unexplainable to those around you who have never experienced it.  Of course I have amazing friends and a VERY supportive family that have been my back bone for the past 7 months...but maybe its the anger in me and the selfishness of loosing Eric, but their advice and comfort doesn't seem good enough still because I just feel like they don't GET IT.  So, I guess I just would like to come on here and hear about others experiences and how you all have handled your loss and what keeps you moving.

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Dear Members,

We are excited to mention that we are moving to a more new and improved message boards on MONDAY MORNING AUGUST 9th! The boards will be done for a few hours while we are making the conversation. Remember we posted information about this move a month ago. For some of you this might seem a bit sudden,  but when we were reviewing the site we determined the current message board you are using is out of date and the company that designed it is no longer in existence. The good news is this new message board will have new features that have been requested in the past like more fields we can add to your profiles and a chat room up to 20 people at one time. If we find the chat room is bursting at the seams we will add additional room for extra people. All your old posts, private messages and such will be migrated to the new message board. You might have to put up your profile picture again but not sure. The new company will be doing the migration for us. Here is a short list of some of the new features on the board:

- Custom Profile Fields

- Users can customize their profile pages by selecting a background color or background image, with tiling options.

- Facebook and Twitter Integration

- users can respond to multiple posts at once with "mini-quote"

- Pinned discussion threads - like welcome to our board etc.

- Announcements made across some boards or the entire message board

- Search: Users can easily find all content generated by a particular member, by clicking the 'Find Content' button that appears on the main profile page, or in the Mini Profile Popup which can be accessed throughout the board. The results page allows content to be filtered by application, as well whether the member created it or merely participated in it.

- Privacy: allows users to sign in anonymously, hiding them from the online users list. Users also have the option to disable personal conversations and user-to-user emails, as well as ignore other users if necessary.

The next exciting piece of news about the new message board is it will have a new domain name of www.grieving.com for search engine optimization purposes. It will still be apart of Beyond Indigo and can be found through www.beyondindigo.com. We will be redirecting your current URL's to this new domain name but we might miss a few. If that is the case simply go back to www.grieving.com or www.beyondindigo.com to find your message board thread. We will try to make the transition as seamless as possible.

The bottom line is the new board will give us room to grow our community and more options to interact better with each other.

If you have any questions please direct them to feedback@beyondindigo.com.

Kelly Baltzell, MA

CEO/President

Beyond Indigo Family

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aepstein99

Hello, I am new to the forum and lost my best friend at age 32 to cancer in October, and my other friend in a sudden snowboarding accident in February. I miss my best friend sooo much she was always there for me and was the only person who really understood what living with chronic pain was like for me. I don't understand why it had to be her.....she was so special, and she won't be here for my wedding in the fall, makes it hurt all the more. And i work with brain tumor children, so why am I not handling this the way I do with my clients????

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ModKonnie

Hi ArielEpstein,

It's harder to deal with loss when it is personal. As a counselor, you probably have to keep a professional and emotional distance (even though that is probably quite impossible at times).

We may never understand why; instead, I find it easier just to know that there is a bigger plan that I may not be aware of and things happen because of things I may just never know or understand. I know that may not be helpful at times, but things are what they are and we simply have to move forward the best we can.

What kind of cancer did your friend struggle through? Do you feel like posting a picture of your friends that you lost? What happened in the snowboarding accident?

We will be here for you,

ModKonnie

Hello, I am new to the forum and lost my best friend at age 32 to cancer in October, and my other friend in a sudden snowboarding accident in February. I miss my best friend sooo much she was always there for me and was the only person who really understood what living with chronic pain was like for me. I don't understand why it had to be her.....she was so special, and she won't be here for my wedding in the fall, makes it hurt all the more. And i work with brain tumor children, so why am I not handling this the way I do with my clients????

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