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      Hi all,  I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.  Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.  As always, we will be here with you, ModKonnie
BigDad

Infidelity

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Feb 2016, I come home and find my brother's cell making all kinds of ringtone and notification noise on the kitchen table. I figured it was our mother so I picked it up and there it was. Messages from him and my wife. We were having some marital problems, yes. My best friend was murdered along with the sister of my ,at the time, wife. At that point in my life me and my wife had been together for 13 years. The last 6 of those she suffered miserably from the onset of schizophrenia. I finally left her because I could no longer take care of her. I should have seen a therapist to deal with the loss of my BF and feelings of abandoning my wife. I didn't. I re-married and the depression started to hurt our marriage. 

After learning of the affair I moved out. Since then I've been taking anti-depressants and seeing a therapist. I sit here every night in shock. My own flesh and blood and my wife betrayed me. How in the hell could they do this? I bought a gun and have been planning to use it on myself. This is pain I can not bear. Every night I try to think of just one reason to go on. God, I miss my wife. I want my life back.

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BigDad, 

Get rid of the gun. Talk to your therapist about your feelings of wanting to end things. Do you work? Start working at night or change your routine. I know this is so difficult, but join a group in person and start talking to people--anybody. The best way to heal is to talk. 

Of course you miss your old life because you were comfortable. You will get comfortable again. It's going to take a bit of time. Have you considered exercising at all--taking walks or joining a gym or anything? Exercise is a great way to relieve depression. 

We will be here for you,

ModKonnie

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Big Dad, 

I want to give you some resources for people who have considered suicide. Please call or get in touch with someone:

For those who may be facing the thought of suicide, most unfortunately, know that there are others who truly care about you!

There is a Toll-Free Number available in the U.S.A. to call if such thoughts are in one's mind. You will find great people with a caring attitude who are there to help you!

 

 

1 - 800 - 273 - TALK

 

Additional Resources:

Suicide Grief Support Forum: http://www.suicidegrief.com/

Survivors of Suicide: http://www.survivorsofsuicide.com/

Youth Suicide Prevention Information: http://spyc.sanpedro.com/suicide.htm

Befrienders Worldwide: http://www.befrienders.org/

 

Again, We will be here with you,

ModKonnie

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Big dad, you have purpose and meaning and happiness and love to give, and love to receive. Do not give up, I promise it will get better :( I am so so sorry that you feel this way. Don't let these thoughts consume you. Find a confidant, express how you're feeling, see a therapist, maybe write down a few things you enjoy about your life?

 

Please let us know how you are doing. XO

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