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mrssadmom

My Best friend/Love/Glue/Everything

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My husband committed suicide. We have a (6) Year old son. I am now fighting for "In loco parentis" for his older two children that I raised since they were (1) and (4) they are now (9) and (12) this happened dec 2014. I had more written out but it wont let me copy and paste I am LOST I need so much help from peers

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I am so very sorry for your tragic loss. Your life has been changed forever and now you are still struggling with finding your new norm. I know I cried uncontrollably everyday for a solid year and I still cry often and I will never get the image out of my head. Survivors of suicide have a whole other set of things to go through other than grief. We feel tremendous guilt and have a million questions that will never be answered.

 

First of all, let me say that it wasn't your fault. Those that take their lives, whether because of depression, chemical imbalance, medication, drugs, alcohol, whatever the reason, are unable to cope with life's hardships. Most people do have the coping ability and deal with issues and go on. They do not, therefore, that is not your fault. You will go through so many stages of dealing with this and with the healing process.

 

Second, talk about it. Whether here online, in a support group, prayer or with friends, talk about it over and over until you are tired of talking about it. Get it out. Also, stay busy. I am sure you will stay busy with your children but also be good to yourself. Your mind, body and emotions have been shattered into a thousand pieces and it will take time to heal. So be good to yourself. It's okay if you cannot focus, it's okay if you need to go to your happy place often, it's okay to reach out for help.

 

It is true that time does help. You will never be the same and your life will never be the same but you do come out stronger. Don't let their inability to cope make you give up as well. Think how strong you have had to be the past few months, stronger than you ever thought. But with prayer, God's help and a good support group or friends to talk to, you can do it.

 

Once again, I am so sorry and I do understand. Please feel free to contact me anytime and we can talk. May God wrap his arms around you and your family, keep you close to his heart, comfort you and give you strength. My sincerest sympathies, Sherry

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We don't do drugs, His family sent me an email blaming me. He shot himself I found him and tried to save him. But they all hate me. They don't even check on our son anymore.

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