Cat loss:Devastated

[shavina5]

Yesterday morning around 3 a.m my 10yrs old cat Po passed away in front of me. I am so devastated about his death that last night I wanted to commit suicide. My cat was very strong, happy, loved hunting,woke me up everyday,waited for me at the bathroom,sat in my lap when I was having dinner (but never touched my food),waited for me to come home..well my world was so happy with him. After a hard day at work or a bad day he would always comfort me..knew exactly how I felt..just the sight of him would make all my stress vanish and my heart would be at peace.

My neighbour has a kid who must be around 5-6yrs and the neighbour confined my Po for four days. Even though I kept calling him in the morning and at night he didn't come and I couldn't hear him so I couldn't go to the neighbour to look for him and I don't talk to my neighbour. So Monday morning it was raining heavily and my mum was outside and the kid's grand mother saw my mum and told her that the cat is in front of her entrance. My mum (who is having some issues with me) didn't pick up Po. Then my brother came home and called me to say he found the cat. I took an early leave from work to take it to the vet. The vet said he was dehydrated and could not pee. He emptied Po's bladder.He gave an antibiotics injection and said my Po had stones so gave him another injection to break the stone. He asked me to hydrate it and try to make it pee. He asked me to bring it back the next day and if it didn't pee he would do surgery on him. But unfortunately my Po didn't make it and I am so sad. Maybe I am depressed also.

My father had an accident and broke his leg. I am taking care of him but my mum doesn't want me to look after him and she is harassing me morally. My Po was my only friend who understood me and comforted me. Now I have lost him due to my neighbour's fault and I am so lost. Yesterday I couldn't concentrate at work. I kept crying all the time. Today as well was a difficult day but I managed to control my tears. I am finding it so difficult to cope without him and with my mother.

I just want to talk about my grief. I remember last week around this time Po was in my lap on my bed. Before it died I stroke him at his favourite places and comb his fur. Even in his pain he seemed happy I did that for him but he was very scared and would jump up at every little noise e.g when I was switching on the lights or when my bones was cracking when I was kneeling to check on him.

My life has gone upside down. My Po has been with me through some very hard times but we spend some very good times as well. I miss him so much. My life and my bed is so empty without him. He was very possessive of me. He had so many more years to live. He had a healthy lifestyle and was athletic. His death is a shock to me.

[Isa]

Shavina5 I hope you are ok?

Po looks like such a beautiful cat and it's so unfortunate that you and your mum are not getting along.

Be strong.

I lost my cat yesterday too my cat of 18 years was put to sleep and it just breaks my heart, I can't stop crying I can't stop missing her... I was there with her loving her and thanking her for being my cat for all those 18 years as she got her injection...

It all feels surreal and wrong, my heart aches so much that I keep having panic attacks, I call out for her but she is not here. I will never pat her be with her or see her in this life again

My place feels so quiet and lonely without her I don't know how I will cop. I mss her with all my being and am grateful that I got to be her mum for all those years.

But the pain of the loss is so great. I can't eat or sleep I can't stop crying... I miss her so much. I want her back!!!

Your not alone in your grief

Sending you lots of hugs and hopefully things settle down for you at home - stay strong xo

[newfriend]

Shavina5,

 

Although our details might be different, much of what you wrote could have ben written by me. The shock, the suicidal thoughts, the wanting to talk about your grief, the feeling emptiness in your life and in your bed, that Po was the only one who understood you and could comfort you, having a hard time at work. And the shock!

 

I know this will not take your pain away dear Savina5, but if knowing that what is happening to you is happening to others...if that knowledge makes your plight more bearable, I sincerely would be happy to hear it has. You are not alone in what is happening to you.

 

I understand you.  I always tell people they can email me any time if they wish and you are no exception.

 

It will be a very long time before any of what has happened makes sence. And by that I mean it will be a very long time before you can piece all of this together.

 

I put my story in a thread that someone else on this forum started.  Her thread begins with "I lost my cat yesterday after 19 years ...am broken with grief".

 

I smiled big time when reading what you put that Po was athletic. I think that is the cutest thing I have ever read about a cat. And the pictures are adorable. No wonder you miss Po!

 

Take care,

Your new friend