Big Brothers Death

[krisb]

My brother passed away suddenly on 2-2-15.  His name is Greg, he died from the Widow Maker heart attack.  He was only 48 years young.  He had no previous signs of any kind of heart condition.  I am so overwhelmed with grief.  I think of him all day long, every day.  I cry at the drop of a hat.  I miss him so much.  My world is crushed.  Nothing is the same.  I am not the same.  I think I am forever changed.  I am always so sad.  I can hardly speak his name.  I miss him.  I want him back, even if only for an hour.  I just want to tell him how much I love him, tell him how sorry I am that we didn't spend more time together.  I hug him one more time, to smell him, to hear his wonderful laugh.  I will even take one more brotherly punch. 

[ModKonnie]

Krisb,

I am so very sorry about the loss of your brother, Greg. Do you have any other family members to lean on for support? Any friends? It is tough to say the least, but I know it doesn't help much now, but it will get better. It's going to take some time. For now, cry if you want to, and just feel however you want. It's okay. Try to talk to people about how you feel, because talking is the best way to heal. Is there a support group in your area? Can you join? 

 

We will be here for you,

ModKonnie

[chablinos]

I am right there with you krisb. Lost my big brother two weeks ago. People keep telling me how he's with me in spirit, and I appreciate the sentiment, but I want him HERE. We lived 3000 Miles apart, so didn't see each other often, but the love and familiarity were there, so I always felt like he was there, even if we hadn't talked for a couple of months. Now, it just feels impossible to believe I can't call him up, talk about fixing the car, or whatever. I'd give almost anything for another minute of him. Does that sound familiar to you? Are we in the same boat? I just can't take another minute of people telling me he's in a better place. He's my big brother. He's supposed to be here when I need him. There's never been a me without him until this.

[chablinos]

PS. I am really sorry about Greg. My brother was only 49. This is bull--it, what we are going through. Too young, too soon, too sudden, too everything.

[chablinos]

One last thing: you are a different person. Still a person. Still a person with a meaningful life to live. But this loss does make you a different person. You and I are in a club we never wanted to join.

[Guest]

I lost my brother 10 months ago and it has not become any easier. The pain is horrific! period.

[susann]

I'm very sad to join this club. My brother just died . He had lymphoma but we thought we had years. I was going to be his stem cell donor.  I can't stop torturing myself replaying the last day... should have gone earlier, stayed later, said this, said that.   Now he is buried next to our sister.   I have no siblings and feel so alone.

[Rosie]

I am so sorry to hear about all of your losses! I just lost my big brother suddenly at the end of July. It was an accidental gunshot that no one can quite figure out. I am at a loss of words to how I truly feel. He was my everything. We were best friends. I was the last one to see him alive and we got into a stupid argument. I am so scared that I will never forgive myself for that. If it weren't for my oldest brother who found him. It could have been hours or even a day or two till we found him. I am in complete denial. I refuse to let myself think about it because I truly just can't handle it. The image of him lying there like that and everything just haunts me every minute of everyday. The only time I actually believe he is gone is when I replay that morning of finding him and trying to save him. It was horrifying!