My kitty just unexpectedly died :( I am feeling very anxious and depressed.

[Deeders]

I don't know what happend. My cat ,pigeon ,was only 7 years old. I was 14 when we got her. My friends uncle had found these tiny new born kittens in a hole on the back of his property and the neighbors dog was trying to eat them . He looked for the mother and could never find her so he tried to find homes for them. I remember running as fast as I could home because I was so afraid someone else was going to take the little gray one I wanted with all my heart. We nursed her and she became the perfect cat for me. Her personality was so amazing and exactly what I needed out of my pet. She gave me so much joy. I am devastated as a write this. On January 14 2015 ,she died. She wasn't sick or old. I have so much guilt surrounding this. The night before, on 1/13/14 she slept with me in my bed . Around 3:00 am I woke up to her about to barf on my duvet, so I quickly put her off my bed so she would barf on the floor instead. It wasn't unsuaual for her to barf because she would often try to over eat (she was a bit of a Piggie) . I was pissed so I put her out of my room. About 8 am I heard her scratching to get in, but I didn't get up. A little while later I went out to run some errands. I came home and was down stairs for about 2 hours. My mom went upstairs to take a shower when she called me to come upstairs in a tone that I will never forget. I knew something was wrong but I never expected it to be my baby. We have another cat that is 18 years old so I am more prepared for her death. My baby was laying on the bathroom floor . She just looked like she was sleeping but she had a red eye. There was nothing around that she could have eaten and no vomit or anything around her. I feel so depressed and guilty because what if I missed something. All she wanted was to cuddle that morning by I couldn't be bothered to get my stupid ass out of bed. I feel this guilt weighing on me coupled with the anxiety of not having her with me anymore. Did I miss something ?????? What if I could have saved her ?? My mom thinks it may have been a stroke or a brain aneurism , but I just feel guilty for not cuddling that last day. Was I wish I had never gone out. Maybe k xkukd have saved her. That was her last memory of me

[Steve s mom]

Sorry for your loss ,there's no way you could have known

[Deeders]

This really hurts