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MegLiz14   

Hello, 

 

I'm new to this site but I've joined because I've been dealing with Grief and it's becoming worse. I don't know how many people will support this post but all I'm asking for is a little compassion and help. See lately I've told my friends, and now my family that I am bisexual. But if you knew my family they are very religious and don't approve of the decision I have made. This is causing a great deal of stress for me, and is making me grieve for the decision that I have made about my sexuality. They make me feel worthless, and I still can't be honest with them. My friend is okay with what I've chose, but it's the parents that have hurt me the most. They say that I'm not welcomed and that hurts. Especially, since I am the last child in the house. Plus, it's not like I'm 18 and they still chose everything for me I'm like 25. This is a huge problem that I've been grieving over and over which has caused me to be diagnosed with depression. 

So why I'm telling you all this is not for sympathy, but for some hope and encouragement. I don't need sympathy I'm just wondering if there is anyone else who's had to deal with not fitting in with their parents or even the similar problem. 

I thank you for taking the time to read this, I hope everyone has a great New Year and I hope this will help me to have a better 2015! 

 

Meg 

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Plimsole   

Hi Meg

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'm disappointed that your parents have told you you're not welcome. Are you still staying at home now or have you had to move? I can't imagine how that level of rejection feels for you, but you can either be what they want you to be or be true to yourself and find your own path. If you become what you want, then you'll only make yourself miserable and at the end of the day, it's your life. You need to live it for you. They can't live their lives through you. You see this in other situations where parents push their children to have the career they want, but it's just pushy parents trying to live their dreams through their kids I stead of allowing them to discover their own path. Sadly, some parents are more concerned about how their children make them look to the outside world rather than their children's happiness.

I'm not close with my family and I wish I'd had the strength and self esteem to just be who I wanted to be, but it's not easy when you're living at home.

Do you have support from your siblings? I do hope your parents will come round to accepting your choice. Surely they can't be comfortable with the feeling of possibly losing their own child to their prejudicial thinking? Do they see your choice as some sort of sin? Is that what religion does? Punishes and discriminates people for being the person they feel they are? As long as you're not harming anyone or doing anything damaging or illegal, then who's to choose what's right for you apart from you? You're an adult!

Have you spoken to them since your post? I know you're grieving because essentially, you're either losing your parents or losing your identity. Sadly, your parents are making you make a choice.

I do hope they can accept you for who you are and that you find your happiness.

Take care.

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