Piano Teacher

[artelutio]

Hi. My name is Ashley, and I'm 17 years old.

Today, a little less than an hour ago, I was informed by my mom — who was told by her sister — that my piano teacher had died. My reaction? I had no reaction. Because of my lack of emotion, I'm confused and slightly scared.

Firstly, I've only known my piano teacher since late December of 2013. My lessons with her started on the first or second Tuesday of January, 2014. However, she was one of the kindest people I had ever met, and she made me feel really good about my blossoming talent each week. I am a person who suffers from extremely low self-esteem and moderate to severe depression (not diagnosed, just self-concluded), so hearing "you play very well for a beginner" at each lesson made me feel great.

About a month ago, we found out that my piano teacher had been diagnosed with liver cancer. That week, she told my mom that my lessons would be cancelled until November because she would be going to the hospital frequently. The first week of November was here, and having learned more songs than I was assigned, I was feeling pretty pumped to start up again and begin learning Christmas music. Tuesday came, and she never called to say, "Lessons start again today."

Today is Thursday. The day my piano died while in a coma we didn't know she was in. My chest hurts, and my eyes have slightly watered, but I feel nothing. I feel numb. I'm concerned for myself because I know I'm supposed to feel sad. I WANT to feel sad and grieve.

What's happening, and what can I do about it?

[mydeepestthoughts]

Dear Ashley,

I am sorry to hear about you teacher.When someone dies there are a range of emotions that we can experience. Those emotions are influenced by our relationship with the person, how long we have know them, and how often we have interacted with them. So you response of feeling badly, and misty eyed could be appropriate...we shouldn't judge ourselves by how we respond, by comparing how others may do under the same circumstances.

Something you may want to focus on is the time when all bad news will be a thing of the past, and things even like depression are no longer around. Many say that such a thing is impossible...but is it? A heartwarming scripture that gives us hope is at Rev 21:3,4 which reads "And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes,and death will be no more,neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore.The former things have passed away.”...This has to be a promise for the future, because everywhere today we see nothing but suffering, pain and outcry. But can we rely on this promise? What helps you to trust a person when they make you a promise? Isn't it easier to do so when they have keep their promises in the past?

When you take a deeper look into the bible, you will see that we can trust God's promises.

For more answers to life situations, and questions that many young ones encounter visit the link below.

http://www.jw.org/en/bible-teachings/family/teenagers/ask/

May you find peace.