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It's been 8 months


backyarder1

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backyarder1

It's been 8 months since the love of my life passed away. It is sad to get back on this forum after so many months and see so many new people and remember how bad those first days, weeks and months were.

 

I made it through the worst. I think when we are in love, we think "I would just die if I lost them." And then you lose them. And you wonder how you make it through. But most of us do. A few don't, I suppose. But even while you are making it through, you wonder how you are doing it. It really seems like you have such LITTLE support. And the pain is unbearable and for me, anyway, I wondered if it was worth trying to make it through, many times. But I did.

 

I'm not going to say that I'm not still sad. There is a hole in my heart that will never be filled.....a light that has gone out in me forever. But I have to just keeping taking things one day at a time. There are days when I am happy. And days when I am sad. But life has always been that way. We just have to learn to treasure the good days.

 

For those of you who have just started on this journey, things will get better. You will have ups and downs but things do get better.

 

My heart is with you all.

 

Betsy

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It is now nearly six months since I lost my dear wife after 49 1/2 years of marriage.Everyday I try to clear some of my wifes clothes and belongings. I am too upset to even look at them. . When do you think it will be possible to move my wifes clothes and am I being too sentimental. Any advice would be appreciated Brijac

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backyarder1

Hi Brijac. I don't think there are any rules about when you should or shouldn't deal with your wife's stuff. I just do things in stages. Very early on, I was able to get rid of things that had no sentimental value to me. Like underwear or shirts that I never saw Tom wear. Later, I went through his closet again and found other shirts that I didn't feel any sentiment for. I just take it a little at a time. I wouldn't even think about doing it yet if it still causes you sadness. In my mind, it is sadder to see a big old empty closet than it is to see Tom's stuff.

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