Jesse David & Taylor Mom

Grief Poems Writings & Songs on Loss of Child: Feel Free to Share Yours

87 posts in this topic

Hopes and Dreams Lost

Today I touched what you left behind,
Oh, so many memories attached to it all.


I gently rub my fingers across the last shirt you wore,
And try to inhale your remaining scent embedded in the fabric.

Packing and sorting your life, your hopes and dreams that will never be...
What am I searching for among this earthly stuff?


Perhaps trying in vain to recreate that which is lost,
And I want to pretend so hard that yesterday never happened….

I remember the words of Jesus, “In my house are many mansions…”

Prepare my heavenly place next to you, oh so close,
Where you will always be within the reach of my embrace…

Your Mom forever…

 

Jesse David's Mom

 

 

 

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Poem posted by Lora, Cara's Mom for Jesse

 

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RIP Rich Mullins Taken to Heaven: September 19, 1997

 

 

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An Ugly Pair of Shoes

I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes.
Uncomfortable Shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.

Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes.
They are looks of sympathy.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs.
They never talk about my shoes.

To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in the world.

Some women are like me and ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some, have learned how to walk in them so they don't hurt quite as much.
Some, have worn the shoes so long that days will go by,
before they think of how much they hurt.

No woman deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of the shoes I am a stronger woman.
These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.

~Author Unknown~

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What does it look like in heaven?
Is it peaceful is it free like they say?
Does the sun shine bright forever?
Have your fears and your pain gone away?
Cause here on earth it feels like everything good is missing, since you left
And here on earth everything thing is different
there's an emptiness

Oh-oh-oh I, I hope your dancing in the sky
and I hope your singing in the the angels choir
I hope the angels, know what they have
I bet it's so nice up in heaven since you've arrived

Now tell me, what do you do up in heaven?
Are your days filled with love and light?
Is there music? Is there art and invention?
Tell me are you happy? Are you more alive?
Cause here on earth it feels like everything good is missing, since you left
And here on earth everything thing is different

Oh-oh-oh I, I hope your dancing in the sky
and I hope your singing in the the angels choir
I hope the angels, know what they have
I bet it's so nice up in heaven since you've arrived
Since you arrived

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Would it be possible for me to post these poems in our Grieving newsletter? Please do not hesistate to say no if you are uncomfortable with my suggestion.

Thank you. These are amazing poems, and they speak volumes.

 

ModKonnie

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Would it be possible for me to post these poems in our Grieving newsletter? Please do not hesistate to say no if you are uncomfortable with my suggestion.

Thank you. These are amazing poems, and they speak volumes.

 

ModKonnie

Yes, that would be fine with me...if it helps someone else that is good.

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Poems and Writings authored by Dee
~ mom of Erica Eileen ~


Tangible things

They are the possessions we hang on to
long after the event.
The prom dress, yellow satin,
the first skating skirt, double tiered.
her trophies and report cards,
her favorite dolls
and her lefty mitt,
all packed in boxes.
Holy and sacred.
They are things,
the touchstones that I cherish and protect


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Hand me downs

At first,
our grief wears us,
We are attached like a blanket dragging behind a child,
we bump and tumble behind the wake of it all,
getting battered and bruised beyond recognition -
dirty and scarred -

 

We are an accessory to the whole idea of LOSS,
Somehow we don’t even know how the calendar pages turn -
But they do.

After a while when the shock begins to dissipate,
We wear our grief,
Like hand-me-downs that never quite fit right,
Too long, too short, too heavy, way too heavy-
And uncomfortable.

We did not ask to wear these only-for-other-people-clothes
The idea of them is too much to comprehend -
How am I this person without that person?
Who am I now?

************************************

A New Home

She went home - but she took our old home with her,
causing us to search
and discover ways to find shelter,
and to learn to function without oxygen.

I sucked hard and filled my lungs with memories,
from which stores of air live.
And I coughed and sputtered and found shelter in all she left.


************************************

This Mark of Time

I am running backwards through the thicket -
thorns puncture as vivid sequences are pulled from the storage space -
detail specific sequences that insist my immersion.

There are no detours - one must travel through it in order to glean those treasures that lay hidden in the ash and salt.

I know better now - not to fight this darkness -
but to explore these deep catacombs using all senses, using hope,
to show the way through, scratching my love into the walls.

 

 

****************************************

 

Homeless

 

A relentless stream, torrent really

of tears

salt and sting-

sounds finding their way up from deep soul,

like animals wildly searching for a place to be

but unable to rest,

crazy with grief.

 

Home is missing

you are not here

and so my home is missing.

And I circle and cross my own path

all traces of what was-

are gone.

 

By Dee Conmy

 

 

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Laurie.....what a labor of love from your heart.....to compile and post....

   it touches my heart...

  you ...in your dark grief....has let the sadness become a light for others on this sad grief journey....

   thank you....and in gratitude...

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Laurie.....what a labor of love from your heart.....to compile and post....

   it touches my heart...

  you ...in your dark grief....has let the sadness become a light for others on this sad grief journey....

   thank you....and in gratitude...

Thanks so much Susan for your post above...it makes the load a little lighter when you walk this path with someone. Hopefully someone will get a little comfort from this...we need something in this journey through purgatory...

 

Prayers and gentleness...

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I SO relate to your 'Hopes and Dreams Lost'.....I have the shirt John David wore to the hospital...the shirt I gave him for his birthday...his shorts...laying across my wicker rocking chair...in the living area of my home...with photos..various items...his sunglasses...wallet....tennis shoes and socks......he was thinking it would just be an appointment with his Dr.....so casual...

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Thank you everyone for your posts! The songs were so beautiful. I am so lucky to have found you and I am so grateful for the support I feel on this group.

My prayers are there for all.

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For those who are missing their child.... While nothing takes the missing away, we can remember...and hold them close to our hearts....thanks to those who left comments....

 

 

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<iframe width="300" height="90" src="//media.myspace.com/play/song/the-other-side-by-james-linton-7337730-7138914" frameborder="0" allowtransparency="true" webkitallowfullscreen mozallowfullscreen allowfullscreen></iframe><p><a href="https://myspace.com/markirelandmusic'>https://myspace.com/markirelandmusic/music/song/the-other-side-by-james-linton-7337730-7138914'>https://myspace.com/markirelandmusic'>https://myspace.com/markirelandmusic/music/song/the-other-side-by-james-linton-7337730-7138914">The Other Side by James Linton</a> from <a href="https://myspace.com/markirelandmusic'>https://myspace.com/markirelandmusic">Mark Ireland</a> on <a href="https://myspace.com">Myspace</a>.</p>

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We can walk together on a shared path, but there is the carrying of one's beloved in the heart....

As deep as we loved, as deep as we sorrow...

 

 

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Poem posted by Steve's Mom. I very much identified with the last four lines:

 

TIME DOES NOT BRING RELIEF
By Edna Saint Vincent Millay

Time does not bring relief; you all have lied
Who told me time would ease me of my pain!

I miss him in the weeping of the rain;
I want him at the shrinking of the tide;
The old snows melt from every mountain-side,
And last year's leaves are smoke in every lane;
But last year's bitter loving must remain
Heaped on my heart, and my old thoughts abide.

There are a hundred places where I fear
To go - so with his memory they brim.
And entering with relief some quiet place
Where never fell his foot or shone his face
I say, 'There is no memory of him here!'

And so stand stricken, so remembering him.

 

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Take Away

 

Instead of Christmas gifts for me, come take some things away.

There's so much here that I don't want;

so please don't give....just take.

 

Take away my knowledge of funerals and urns and graves;

and take away the guilt I have for not being with him to save.

 

Take away these inward screams that resonate his death;

and take away my begging to give him back his breath.

 

Take away this heartache that leaves me living in pain;

and take away all the years after this sadness came.

 

Take away this loneliness that stays throughout the year;

and take away this horror that just won't disappear;

 

Take away the empty space he no longer occupies;

and take away these tears of mine that forever fill my eyes.

 

Take away the silence that reminds me that he is gone;

and take away my wondering how things could be so wrong.

 

Take away my questions Why....that cause never ending grief;

and take away my doubting that has shattered my beliefs.

 

Take away most anything, especially his untimely death--

 

Please don't take away my memories, they are all that I have left.

 

by Christine Ross 2006

 

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This Youtube video on Michael Rosen's Sad Book was first posted by Dee. I felt it definitely was worth reposting here. Thanks Dee for sharing this.

 

Michael Rosen's Sad Book by children's poet, Michael Rosen. The Sad Book is a kind of long poem written for Rosen's son Eddie, who passed away unexpectedly at age 18.
 

 

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I wrote this tonight after purchasing the tree for Khyri's grave.  I wasn't going to share, but I know that I'm not the only mama feeling it, and I know this is a safe place, I hope it helps even one other person know they aren't alone in their thoughts.

 

Twas two weeks before Christmas
And all through the house
A heartache was looming
No laughter could douse
A tiny tree sat
In the  corner with care
Cuz Mom wasn't ready 
To take it out there
To that cold little grave

Dirt still in a heap
Where so often she'd go
To ponder and weep
Her baby lay sleeping
So quiet and still
Taken to soon

And against Mommy's will
Her stocking still hung
Like the Christmas before
And Mommy still hoped
She would come through the door
This Christmas would be
Unlike any other
And so flowed the tears
Of the heartbroken mother
"She'd love all these lights,"
She thought to herself
As she thought of their plans
For the elf on the shelf
What would she wish for? 
And what would she wear?
Would she want to make cookies?

Or would she not care?

Would she watch the TV shows?
Or just fall asleep?
When she got to see Santa
Would she laugh, run, or weep?
Mama's heart broke
As she thought of it all 
And prayed as she let
Another tear fall
"Please, God, if you could,"
She prayed into the night
"Give my angel a kiss, 
And sweet dreams tonight."

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An amazing....poem....coming straight from a Mama's shattered heart...please consider yourself hugged by me...

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