Father's Day

[4froggies]

I wanted to start this up so that we can spend the next week sharing our fond memories of our dad's. So often I fall into a pattern where I spend too much time thinking about his death and not his life.

This is my second Father's day without my dad, I would like to celebrate his success in raising me and share with you a few memories when I get the chance and look forward to hearing yours.

[DianeS]

This will be my first father's day without my dad.  That realization has only begun to hit me as I've been passing all of the cards and special Father's Day gifts in the store.  I find myself quickly looking away from them, or moving to a different aisle.  The 'firsts' are always the hardest, aren't they? 

My dad was such a great guy.  Soft spoken, a man of few words and a great husband and father.  He rarely spoke the words "I Love You" when we were kids, but we were always knew it by the way he was with us.  He loved my mom and treated her with such respect, which also spoke volumes to us while we were growing up.  He was heartbroken when my youngest brother was killed in an air force plane crash and yet he was able to be the rock that we all needed when our family was changed in an instant.  I'll never forget how he drew my mom, my two brothers and I to himself.  He wrapped his arms around us and said with such conviction, "We'll get through this together."  And we did.  That was also the day that my dad began to tell us frequently that he loved us.  My brother's death hurt him so badly, and yet it also revealed a man with a tender heart.  We never again parted or hung up the phone without saying, "I love you," and each of his grandchildren heard it often from the day they were born until the day he died.  We spoke for the last time the night before he died peacefully in his sleep after a five year battle with pulmonary fibrosis.  His last words to me were, "I love you." The next day when the family gathered after getting word of his death, we were surprised and so blessed to discover that the night before he died he'd asked my step mom for a paper and pencil and this man of few words wrote a two page letter expressing his love and gratitude to each of us, including my eight step sisters and brothers.  It is a gift we all cherish.  

Happy Father's Day Dad.  I miss you so much.

DianeS 

I miss my dad dearly, but when I reflect back tonight I think back to how he dealt with the death of my brother and my mom.  Although his heart was broken with each loss, he never gave up.  He taught my brothers and I and our children that life deals you some very hard blows, but that it does not have to defeat you or make you bitter.  Even as he grieved, he moved ahead and embraced life in a way that would honor my brother and mom.  It's my goal to do the same and in doing so, it's my hope to honor him in return.  I am grateful for every day I had with my dad.   

[DianeS]

Not sure how the last paragraph of my post ended up after I signed it.  Strange.

[kathleen24]

I lost my father in 1988.  He sufferred a massive heart attack and died within 12 hours.  Being the only daughter in a 4 kid household, I was his daughter... and we shared some very special times.  He was an outdoors man and my affinity for the natural world is his life-gift to me.

I remember one event very clearly that most represents him and how he knew a part of my soul very intimently.  One day when I was about 9 he came home from work and told me to go out to the car and get a box from the back seat.  Of course I felt like I was sent on an errand... until I picked up the box and heard little chirps.  In the box were a dozen newly born mallard ducklings.  We lived on a lake - I raised those ducklings until they were old enough to be released on the lake.  For years after we had larger and larger broods come back.  We would swim around them and hand feed each year's new chicks. 

About 2 years after his death I received a very significant award.  Without hesitating, I picked up the phone and called him... never even thinking he died 2 years earlier.  I think we carry our parents in our hearts and souls forever, as they carried us from babies to adults. 

Thanks for allowing me to share my memories.

To those of you who have recently (?) lost a father, I wish you treasured memories to ease your grief, although I understand that process, in some degrees, and at some moments, remains devastating.

[kathleen24]

Dianne,

I was touched by the memorial of your father.  My father passed away 20 years ago and there are still moments that his loss leaves me in grief.  It is different, of course, but difficult nontheless.  I loved my dad so dearly, and while he was not the kind of man who frequently and openly often showed those little daily shows of his affection for me, the very special things he did, and times we shared as only a daughter and dad can have, were remakable.  Knowing how much he loved me saw me through the most difficult of times.  I hope you continue to celebrate your dad...  now and always.

Warm Regards

[ernurse99]

[align=left]hey evryone! i havent been on in awhile... things have been going ok until tonight when i went to bed and just had this suddden thought of fathers day in one week... my dad died dec2 2007 and this will be my first fathers day with no father... i freaked out and had to leave the bedroom because i didnt want to wake my boyfriend i suddenly felt like i did when my mom called to tell me he was being rushed to the hospital and they were doing cpr... it feels so fresh tonight... i know i am not alone with everyone here... my mom told me tonight that she packed away some of his clothes an i was angry for some reason? i really havent been upset in a few weeks and thought i was doing better and now feel like i am right back to where i started... [/align]

[align=left]thanx for listening!!!!![/align]

[align=left]sarah:([/align]

[cryingeyes]

Hello all,

I just want to share that I cannot think about my dear Daddy without crying and this is my 3rd Father's Day without him.

I thank God for him everyday. He was good and kind and true.  And I really miss him so much.

Prayers to all who visit this site.

 

[4froggies]

Like most of us, my dad and I had a very special relationship. I was always able to make him laugh (even when he didn't want to) and he was always able to make me feel loved (even when I wanted to be left alone).

It's hard for me to pinpoint my favorite memory of my dad.  I have so many. 

Most recently I would have to say it was in his excitement after my engagement to my now husband.  My husband did it "old fashioned style" and asked for my hand in marriage. I was the 9th of my dad's kids and the first he was able to give permission for the hand in marriage.  If he had his way, we would have been wed the next month, he was so excited.  So proud. 

I promised myself I would focus on good memories this father' day and not focus so much on the fact that he is gone.  It's so hard, but I will continue to try.

I am now 4.5 months pregnant with our first child.  I would have loved to have been able to share that fact with him, but will never have that chance. My family is convinced this baby is a gift from my dad, as it is due just 2 days before his birthday.  My aunt says this is my dad's continued gift of unconditional love.  That he wanted me to know how it felt to love a child as much as he did.  I can't wait to see the sparkle in my child's eyes knowing that he/she is carrying a piece of my dad with him/her...

Don't cry...don't cry...I will not cry...I will not cry...

More memories tomorrow....

[4froggies]

I love you, Dad.

[sunkenspirits]

My most recent fondest memory of my father is that he always liked to goof around. We'd go in Walgreens and wait for the prescriptions to be ready. He'd get bored, so he'd go where they had all those stuffed animals that sing and he'd turn on like five of them. Pretty soon a racket would fill the air and he'd get dirty looks from the employees. I'd tell him that I didn't know him and we'd laugh about it. He thought it was hilarious. I was in Walgreens by myself the other day, and I thought about doing it, just as a tribute.

Happy father's day Dad, wherever you are...I love you...

[4froggies]

My next favorite memory was of our trip to Disney World 2 years ago. I was recently engaged and couldn't afford it, but managed to anyhow, knowing it was a rare opportunity that I might not get again.  Little did I know.

I remember how facinated you were the the mamma duck and her little ducklings. 

I remember that first day of your "seminar" as my sister and I were getting ready to go to the Magic Kingdom, I get an out of breath cell call from you asking us if we'd left yet and we said no and you asked us to wait up. You skipped class that day and went to Disney World with us.  I was 29 years old at the time, but realized that I had the coolest dad in the world.

That day we went to Epcot Center and had our pictures taken there.  I paid $40 to have the picture of you and I etched onto the monuments just as you walk into Epcot.  The best $40 I ever spent, you loved Disney and I gave you the gift of always being there...

We went to a French restaurant that night, you laughed because the waiter (who of course was French) was offering to take me out for the night, despite my newly acquired diamond on my left hand.  You were also amazed that I polished off my Creme Brulee without even a thought...

I remember you being specifically told by mom not to buy anymore "crap" when you were down there. So you had me buy the Mickey n Minnie Movie Theater "house" and had it shipped to the house.  You paid me back.  You never told Mom "I" bought it and when the package came she about flipped.  It is still sitting in your bedroom just where you left it...

I remember how disappointed you were when Space Mountain was closed for repairs. I remember how relieved I was because you were no spring chicken and I feared for your heart. You said "my heart is just fine".  A year later you had a heart attack.

I remember back at the hotel when you insisted on buying me a bracelet, just so I could have a souvenir of the trip.  It is so pretty, I cherish it.

I remember when we were in the Disney Christmas Store and you saw a Dopey ornament that you loved.  I bought it for you. It now sits in my living room, along with the other Dopeys you left me after you passed away. 

I cherish them, just as I cherish you. I will forever see the sparkle in your eye every time I think of Disney (especially Dopey--your favorite character). 

Ed is taking me to Disneyland next month, my first visit. I am excited to see it, I wish I could tell you all about it. But then again, I will, in my dreams.....

Love you and miss you so.

[4froggies]

My memories today are simple. As a child I loved the smell of your pipe and how you always had beef jerky in a jar on top of the tv.  As  teenager I loathed (and now love) how protective you were of me and the guys I dated. As an adult, I loved how supportive of me you were, through everything.

I miss you so much Dad. So, so much.

[hansonamysue]

My Dad passed away a little less than a month ago, and I am very sad about doing the Father's Day outing with out him this year. But, Mom and me and my girls, ages 3 and 7 and my husband will go to the small town parade and sit in the same spot we have for years in honor of Dad.

I miss the feel of his cheeks when he would give you a hug and press his cheek against mine, how he smelled like his cherry wood tobacco and Old Spice. His quick whit is really missed around our house.

Love ya Dad, and want you to know we feel your presence here with us.

Love your Favorite Baby

[dadslilgurl]

I'm 19 years old, and I have a little brother that's 13, and we lost our dad a little over 3  months ago.  My parents were divorced, so we visited my dad every other weekend.  But being a social teenager, I always didn't go, thinking I'll be able to go and speed weeks at a time with him over the summer like always.

One of my last memories with my dad was the last weekend I had stayed with him, I was schedualed to work on that Sunday.  I woke up with the idea of going out to eat breakfast with dad, and actually sitting down and haveing a conversation with him, and not being rushed to go to work.  So that's what we did, but I didn't tell him that I called in with an "upset stomach" to be able to spend the morning with him.  He was always the type that you go to work/school unless you just can't get out of bed.  That was a couple of weeks before he pasted away.

At the time, the feeling I had that morning was kind of strange.  But now I know why I did it, and I'm so glad I went with the feeling I had that one morning.

[dadslilgurl]

I'm 19 years old, and I have a little brother that's 13, and we lost our dad a little over 3  months ago.  My parents were divorced, so we visited my dad every other weekend.  But being a social teenager, I always didn't go, thinking I'll be able to go and speed weeks at a time with him over the summer like always.

One of my last memories with my dad was the last weekend I had stayed with him, I was schedualed to work on that Sunday.  I woke up with the idea of going out to eat breakfast with dad, and actually sitting down and haveing a conversation with him, and not being rushed to go to work.  So that's what we did, but I didn't tell him that I called in with an "upset stomach" to be able to spend the morning with him.  He was always the type that you go to work/school unless you just can't get out of bed.  That was a couple of weeks before he pasted away.

At the time, the feeling I had that morning was kind of strange.  But now I know why I did it, and I'm so glad I went with the feeling I had that one morning.

[kathleen24]

You have my deepest regrets regarding the loss of your Father.  While the day will most certainly bring its share of sad moments and tears, I hope it will also allow youto feel his presence.  Having your mom and children present I hope will help you focus on the moment and good memories, although I do not want to make light of the sorrow you feel.  My mother passed away just about a month ago and just a few days ago I went to the hospice center where she died and despite the extreme difficulty that brought, I have been more at peace since that time.  Fortunately, a counselor I am working with had helped me learn to pick and choose the people to be with and events I am able and willing to participate in that allow me to grieve and to strengthen myself.  On Sunday I am going to visit my mother's burial site, next to my father.  It will be my first time going there and I know it is bound to be heartbreaking and healing.  What I have learned so far is that one come with the other, and somehow we beging to heal.  May your day be filled with wonderful memories of your dad, and of how much love you shared.

[jonathan]

Dad, I love you and miss you every day.  You left me when I was barely 20 years old, and there's still not a day that goes by that I don't think about you.  Fortunately, the memories that come to me now are more pleasant than painful.

I remember the road trip we took, just you and me, when I was 14.  I remember going out for long drives with you on Sundays when I was 3-4 years old, and how you'd let me sit on your lap and steer.  I remember going down to the corner bar with you when I was the same age, and you'd have a few beers and buy me orange sodas.  I remember you working your ass off every day to provide for all of us.  I remember you teaching me how to barbecue, how to mow the lawn, and how to be a man.  I remember how you went out of your way to get us a dog, even though you hated dogs.  I remember your laugh, your voice, your jokes, your smile.  I remember everything.

I still miss you and think about you everyday. 

[dadslilgurl]

All that just reminded me of the time my dad took me to a bar once.  We had supper, he had a few beers, and he tought me how to play pool.  My dad also tought me how to drive, and every other Sunday, that I had my learner's, he would let me drive him around all morning.  I found out alot of ways to get around my town, that I had never known until he took me there. 

Also, the only time I've ever been to a beach was just last year.  I absoulutly loved it, and I'm tryin my best to go back this year.  I'm just scared because the first time I walked on the beach my dad was right there beside me.  If it wasn't for him, I still wouldn't have experieced the beautiful sunset on the beach.

[4froggies]

This past year we went to Michigan with mom it was for Ashleigh's first birthday party. We drove her car, it was the first time her car's been on a trip like that since I drove it up with you in the passenger seat and her in the back as we made the trek to meet that precious little baby for the first time. 

This time I was in the passenger seat, my new husband driving.  I looked down into the compartment in the door and saw a syringe. I instantly was taken back to that last road trip with you--having to give yourself your insulin shot in the car because you didn't want to stop because you wanted to meet your granddaughter.

It's the strangest things that take me back to moments. This was one of them. 

On a happier note: I am going to California in a few weeks, it will be my first time.  We are going to the beach, do you remember our trip to the beach my senior year?  You and I walked the beach at every sunset.  It was a great trip--

Tomorrow I am going to your house to work on the yard.  Ed and I have decided to make that our new tradition--our silent tribute to you every year father's day weekend.  He missed you too, says he can't believe you are gone.

I second that..........

[doug42]

I am a widower, the person i am dating is a widower also...she lost her husband on fathers day 2005..we have been apart for a few months now..she was missing him alot and needed to be alone for a while to grieve..its hard for me not to see or speak to her..i feel so bad for her and her son..we allways said that we were a match made in hevan..our mates set us up for sure...i will be sad this weekend, i miss them so much

[ernurse99]

HAPPY FATHERS DAY DAD!!!!! I MISS YOU SO MUCH !!! I STILL CANT BELIEVE IT HAS BEEN 6 MONTHS SINCE I HAVE SEEN OR TALKED TO YOU..... REALITY JUST DOESNT SET IN ALL THE TIME! MOM AND I ARE GOING TO THE CEMETARY TODAY, I KNOW YOUR NOT REALLY THERE ANYMORE UP ABOVE WATCHING OUT FOR US BUT WE ARE GOING TO MAKE SURE YOUR FINAL RESTING PLACE IS WELL TENDED! i LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!! I KEEP HAVING FLASHBACKS OF PREVIOUS FATHERS DAYS AND THE THINGS I WOULD MAKE FOR YOU IN SCHOOL...

DAD YOU WERE THE BEST DAD EVER AND NO ONE CAN TAKE THAT FROM ME!!! I AM VERY PROUD TO HAVE HAD YOU AS MY DADDY!!!!!

LOVE YOUR BABY GIRL

SARAH XOXOXOX

[solemate]

My warmest wishes and hugs  from Australia today - we do not have Fathers day until September.  I hope that your day will not be too tough on you and that you will remember your Dads in a way that best suits each one of you.  Take care - gayle

[4froggies]

We worked in your yard yesterday, basically spending the day as you would have in life.  It's so hard seeing all of your hard work and the life you put into your gardens and not have you to share it with.

Happy Father's Day, Dad. I miss you more than I ever thought possible and my heart still breaks every day knowing that you aren't here with me.

I love you Dad

Missy

[hansonamysue]

Happy Father's Day Pops!

The breakfast at church this morning was wonderful as usual and so many friends in the beer gardens on Saturday night too. It wasn't the same taking the girls on the rides and to the parade without you.  We all missed you so much today, just seemed like something was missing all day.

I love you Dad!

 

[4froggies]

Congratulations to us all for having made it through another one of those dreaded holidays. Not that any of them are "fun", but this one is so pointedly a rememberance of our lost father's it just makes it that much more difficult.

 

My continued prayers to everyone.