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My mom is terminally ill


ZaraDees

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AjayRedonkulus

I am sorry to hear it, my father died last week after a short, terminal illness and all I can say is don't ever think it's over just because they say 'terminal'. Enjoy every second, and be strong. Hard I know, but it is going to be so much harder on your Mum and she'll need you every step of the way.

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My mother passed 3 days ago. you loose it for a few days. My mother was terminal everything from cancer,liver and kidney . I was her caregiver 24 hours a day for 5 years. I hate to say its a rite to maturity.

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Thank you for comments and I am very sorry for your losses.

I feel so helpless. She has bulbar palsy, a form of MND and she is getting weaker every day. She cannot speak, walk, and it is also affecting her chewing food. I am trying to be strong for her but I feel terrible. She is here but only in presence. She cannot communicate anymore. I was jet reading her old emails last night, she cannot even type anymore.

I am finding it really hard to cope.

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Hi Zara,

I am really sorry for your situation, and CNelson, really sorry for your loss, as I also lost my mom very recently, after a short but amazingly damaging terminal illness.

Zara, the illness had somehow taken my mom´s soul, she wasn´t really there anymore. I mean, she was conscious and lucid, but not herself. She wanted out, and although I miss her deeply every single hour of every single day, I think she is happy and at peace right now, free from all the pain and suffering that she had to endure for nearly four months, and especially during the last three weeks of her incredible life.

I know that doesn´t really help when one is grieving, and you are grieving already, have been grieving for a while, I am sure, even though your mom is still here, in body, at least, but when somebody doesn´t have any quality of life, when somebody is in pain, cannot eat, sleep, go to the toilet, breathe, etc, without assistance, when they have lost their zest for life, and when they are in pain every single day, the best one can do is let them go. Not that we really want to, but we have got no choice. At least in my mom´s case, she was ready to go, she didn´t want to go on if it meant continuous suffering, and she never ever wanted to be a burden to anybody, she was too independent and autonomous, and I think feeling unable to enjoy the things she loved and becoming dependent on others really affected her, so unless there was a cure, she didn´t think that living for the sake of living was worth it.

Anyway, I pray for you, and send you a hug, as I know how hard it is too see the person you love the most, and who brought you into this world suffering terribly without being able to do much, except, that is, tell them how much you love them and how much they mean to you, and do this every single day that you can.

Warm regards,

Trish

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Hi Zara,

 

I am really sorry for your situation, and CNelson, really sorry for your loss, as I also lost my mom very recently, after a short but amazingly damaging terminal illness.

 

Zara, the illness had somehow taken my mom´s soul, she wasn´t really there anymore. I mean, she was conscious and lucid, but not herself. She wanted out, and although I miss her deeply every single hour of every single day, I think she is happy and at peace right now, free from all the pain and suffering that she had to endure for nearly four months, and especially during the last three weeks of her incredible life.

 

I know that doesn´t really help when one is grieving, and you are grieving already, have been grieving for a while, I am sure, even though your mom is still here, in body, at least, but when somebody doesn´t have any quality of life, when somebody is in pain, cannot eat, sleep, go to the toilet, breathe, etc, without assistance, when they have lost their zest for life, and when they are in pain every single day, the best one can do is let them go. Not that we really want to, but we have got no choice. At least in my mom´s case, she was ready to go, she didn´t want to go on if it meant continuous suffering, and she never ever wanted to be a burden to anybody, she was too independent and autonomous, and I think feeling unable to enjoy the things she loved and becoming dependent on others really affected her, so unless there was a cure, she didn´t think that living for the sake of living was worth it.

 

Anyway, I pray for you, and send you a hug, as I know how hard it is too see the person you love the most, and who brought you into this world suffering terribly without being able to do much, except, that is, tell them how much you love them and how much they mean to you, and do this every single day that you can.

 

Warm regards,

 

Trish

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