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How do I answer basic questions?

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My oldest son was recently murdered while celebrating his birthday. In an instant I went from 3 sons to 2. How do I answer the basic questions of: how many kids do you have? Is "J" your oldest child?

I'm stumped when I am asked these questions and answers that should roll of my tongue are now stuck in my throat.

Thank you in advance

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Tami4373, You tell everyone you have three sons because you do. When asked how old your son is, you say, "He would have been," or "He was..." When asked if "J" is your oldest son, if he isn't then say something like, "No, my oldest son is...." Just because your son is not with you physically doesn't mean you have to exclude him. He is still and always will be a part of your family. --ModKonnie

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You do you. If you want the world to know that you have three sons, then say it. Over time you may find that you don't want to share that information with everyone, and that's okay too. You just have to do what feels right to you. 

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